#olivia knows that love isn’t always listening
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vivaciousoceans · 4 months ago
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Your last post made me think.
While i understand why it looks like Rafael took away her choices, I think Rafael just gave her the option she was going to refuse to take at a fault.
Yes, she didn't ask him to, nor did she want to, but he did it anyways because he understood, from the moment she asked him to not take the case, that Olivia did not consider once what could have happend to her in a trial where her malpractice would have been taken into question. It did not even cross her mind, nor does she want it to, and, in my opinion, it's because she believed St@bler was going to magically help her.
Now, I am not going to say definitely he would have thrown her under the bus, because I don't think that, but Rafael saw the risks Olivia was going to face and decided he loved her, respected her too much to allow it to happen.
I think love is sometimes not doing exactly everything the other person wants, and facing the risk of losing them because of it, but, in the end, our actions towards them were informed by our love and respect for them.
I think he knew that Olivia's reaction was not going to be positive, but he did it anyways. Because he loved her.
To be my annoying self I am going to leave this quote:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
I agree that she was never going to consider fallout, and I definitely think Rafael knew that. I also still think that was her choice, her sacrifice to make, even if it would’ve destroyed her. But her choice and Rafael’s protection of her aren’t mutually exclusive. She was willing to risk her livelihood for Elliot, and Rafael was willing to risk their relationship for her. That’s where Rafael’s “that’s what you do when you love someone unconditionally” statement comes in. The only one not willing to risk anything, in this scenario, is Elliot.
I do think Olivia loves Elliot unconditionally, and I think she loves Rafael unconditionally. I just happen to think only one of those men loves Olivia unconditionally and the other loves her obsessively, possessively. For me it was never about who Olivia loves unconditionally, it was always about who loves her unconditionally, and for me, that is Rafael. The love Olivia has for Elliot is just too all-consuming, it’s too self-sacrificing, it’s not healthy for her or Noah.
I do love a good quote! I think that one fits our favorite cuban-catholic lawyer really well.
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wandascosmic · 2 months ago
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enough for you
wanda maximoff x fem!reader, natasha romanoff x fem!reader
summary: in which your girlfriend natasha makes you feel like you're never enough. (based off enough for you by olivia rodrigo)
word count: 2069
tags: angst, toxic relationship, insecurity, arguments, cheating, reader feels unloved (and unworthy of love), poor reader can never catch a break, cryptic mention of reader's mother being dead, self- hatred, reader's so sad, nat sucks (like a lot), but wanda comes through at the end like she always does and they have a little meet-cute :), i wrote this in one sitting while listening to enough for you on a loop
part two: so american
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You sigh as you try to do your makeup in your mirror as flawlessly as possible. Every blemish or mark on your face needed to be covered up so you could look perfect for Nat. You were desperate to measure up to the gorgeous women Nat has dated before you and for that, you needed to look absolutely pristine.
In the past year, you’ve done so many new things you weren’t fond of just for Nat to like you. From nearly destroying every single muscle in your body at the gym just to measure up to her rigorous exercise routine, all the way to learning how to cook and bake every single one of her favorite foods until it was all you two ever ate despite your dislike for the majority of her preferred meals, you’ve tried so hard to be everything that Nat liked so she wouldn’t get sick of you. 
You frown slightly, Nat has never once acknowledged your kind gestures and actions, nor reciprocated them. 
“I’m just not the compliment type, Y/N, just drop it,” she had told you one time when you had confronted her on why she never acknowledged your efforts. 
You bit the inside of your cheek and nodded wordlessly. 
***
“I made you your coffee,” you told Nat as she entered the kitchen in the morning. 2 creams, no sugar, just how you like it. 
Nat nodded and took the mug from you, sitting down at the table and barely paying any attention to your gesture. 
Clearing your throat, you tell her, “I also got up early this morning to buy tickets for us to go to that band I know you’ve been wanting to go to for a while.” You cross your fingers behind your back, hoping for her to tell you you’re good enough for her just this once. 
“Sorry, babe, Carol already got them for me,” she responds, your heart falling to your stomach. Putting her empty mug in the sink, she plants a kiss on your lips. “Besides, you don’t even know the lyrics to their songs.” She leaves you on your own in the kitchen. 
I know all of them by heart because of you. 
***
“Hey, Y/N?” Nat asks you one night on the couch. 
“Yeah?” you respond, turning to face your girlfriend. 
“I don’t really feel like myself these days.” Nat pauses. “Do you know what might help?” Despite the content of her question, you still smile, because this was your chance. This was your chance to show her that you might truly be worth loving. 
“First, I’m always here if you need to talk,” you say softly, but Nat makes no sound of acknowledgment next to you. “And second, make your own decisions you believe will be beneficial to you, just for yourself, and do the things that bring you fulfillment,” you explain. 
Nat finally turns and looks at you thoughtfully. “How did you figure that one out?” 
“I read your self-help books,” you reply sheepishly. I read all of them. 
“Wow, you’re pretty smart,” Nat replies, going back to the movie the two of you were watching together. 
And you smile for the rest of the night because that’s the first compliment Nat has given you since you first started dating a year ago. 
***
You and Nat had a fight. It isn’t the first time, but it’s the first time it’s hurt you this much as you truly take in your current reality. 
You’re crying in your shared room, Nat leaving you to go out for drinks you assume. 
Earlier tonight, you made the stupid mistake of asking why she was never there for you, it was during the heat of the moment, but your outrage felt justified due to the fact that she missed your award ceremony for your article in medical research (the third time this year she’s missed one of them but you did your best to forgive her before this), and she had simply scoffed at you telling you that it wasn’t even a big deal anyways. 
But this one was a big deal to you. 
It was research that could have saved your mother. 
“I nearly get killed every time I go out on the job, Y/N! Some stupid neuroscience article is nothing compared to that!” she yelled at you, exhausted from her day at work. 
Your eyes flooded with hurt as Nat’s filled with regret. 
“Wait, I’m sorry,” she said remorsefully. 
The first sign of remorse she’s ever shown you. 
“It’s fine, Nat,” you reply, trying to keep your tears at bay. You weren’t even in neuro, but that didn’t matter. Not to her. “Just go out, like you wanted.” You wave her off to go upstairs to your room. 
“Y/N, wait-” 
You didn’t listen, shutting the door before collapsing to your knees as you started to sob. 
Stupid, emotional, and obsessive. That was what you were. 
***
Nat has been home late for the past few nights, your worry increasing with each passing day. It’s probably something to do with work, but something feels off. 
“Where were you?” you ask Nat as she enters the front door. “I was worried sick.”
“I’m fine, Y/N. I just got held up at work,” Nat doesn’t make eye contact with you. 
“Oh, okay,” you say softly, feeling oddly small compared to your girlfriend. “Couldn’t you have called?” 
“For god’s sake, Y/N, my phone was dead. God, you’re so clingy,” Nat bites back, walking past you to go straight up to your room and slamming the door. 
You sigh, heading for the guest room since you know Nat won’t let you sleep next to her tonight. 
Suddenly, you hear Nat’s phone go off. And you realize that she had left it by the front door. 
Picking it up, you notice, that it’s at nearly full charge. 
Your brows furrow as you see the message your girlfriend received. 
Carol: Had a great time tonight, Nat. 
You don’t stop crying until the sun rises, one phrase ringing through your head the whole night. 
What are you doing wrong? 
***
“Am I not as interesting as the girls she’s dated before me?” you cry to Yelena as she rubs your back in comfort. 
“My sister is an idiot,” Yelena mutters, seeing how your relationship with Nat is tearing you apart. 
“What?” you choke out through your tears. 
“I think you love her more than anyone she’s ever had, and she couldn’t care less.” 
“She’s breaking my heart, Lena,” you sniffle. “But more than that, she’s breaking me.” 
You cry harder into your best friend’s arms.
“I don’t know who I am anymore,” you sob into her shoulder.  
***
“Where were you?” you ask Nat as she comes home past midnight once again. 
“I was at the compound, we had a villain that got out so we had to take care of him.” 
You nod, but Tony already sent you the camera footage for tonight after you told him about your issues with your girlfriend and you know she was with Carol. 
“Are you sure?” you inquired. 
“Yes, Y/N,” Nat says exasperated. “For god’s sake, why are you never satisfied with whatever I do?” she says walking past you. 
“I don’t think that’s true,” you tell Nat from behind her. 
“What?” she says, turning around to face you. 
“You’re never satisfied with me,” you state. “The only thing I’ve ever wanted is to be good enough for you, but nothing I ever do for you seems to make you happy.” 
Nat scoffs. “That’s ridiculous.” 
“I know you were with Carol tonight,” you reveal. 
“No, I wasn’t,” she denies. 
“Tony sent me the footage, I know there was no villain. I know you’re cheating on me, and I know that you never cared about me,” you state. 
“Fine, whatever, I’m going to bed,” Nat says, completely disregarding you and everything she’s done to destroy the person you once were. 
“We’re done, Nat,” you tell her as she walks up the stairs to your once-shared room. 
Nat waves you off like you’ve never meant anything to her. 
And maybe you never did. 
***
“I loved her so much, I still do, and all she did was use me, then throw me away like I meant nothing to her,” you tell Yelena at the drink bar. Nat was away on a mission, so Yelena thought it might be fun for you to join her at one of the Avengers parties. 
“Don’t worry Y/N,” Yelena tells you. “I could tell her to apologize to you, but clearly she’s got some issues to figure out within herself before she can resolve any outside.” 
You nod wordlessly. 
What Yelena says then surprises you, “But honestly? She should be the one feeling sorry for herself.” You look at her curiously. “Someday, there will be someone out there who will love you as deeply as you love them.” 
“I don’t know, Lena,” you say softly. “Nat was everything to me.” 
“Someday, Y/N, you’ll be everything to somebody else.” 
***
1 year later
You’re running late for work, rushing out the door of the coffee shop, and you don’t notice the fact that you’ve bumped into someone until your coffee spills all over the floor, making you gasp. 
“Oh, my god, I’m so sorry,” you tell the figure in front of you, and suddenly you freeze, at the sight of her glimmering emerald green eyes. Like Nat’s, but eternally softer. Eternally more curious. 
“Oh, no worries,” she says with a smile, pulling a few napkins out of her purse. 
“I didn’t spill any on you, did I?” you ask the woman, your mind a mess due to your embarrassment at spilling your coffee, but still quite fuzzy at the sight of her undeniable beauty. 
If you weren’t so much of a useless homosexual, you would bend down and help her clean the coffee she’s currently wiping away. Much like how she’s wiping away your ability to form any sort of cohesive thought. 
“No, I’m ok,” she laughs, standing up once more once all the coffee’s gone. “C’mon, let me buy you a new one.” 
Your eyes widen. “Oh, no, it’s not a big deal. Besides, it’s completely my fault for bumping into you-” 
“I want to,” she cuts off with a soft smile. 
“Oh,” you say softly. “Okay,” you finally resign to the comforting look she gives you.  
“Let me just make a quick phone call,” you let her know, hoping she doesn’t leave. 
“Take your time,” she assures. 
You smile gratefully. 
Your phone call was to call in sick to work for the second time in your life –you didn’t have a busy day today and you were running late anyways– and it was all to spend time with a pretty girl.  
On any other day you’d probably laugh at how pathetic you were, but this woman made you feel an odd sense of uncertainty within your life. 
Like nothing had ever made sense before her. 
Once you hang up the phone, you turn to see the woman already standing there, a white to-go coffee cup with a bit of steam escaping the spout. 
“Here’s your coffee,” the woman hands you the cup with a big smile as you pocket your phone. You inspect the label, your mouth parting slightly in shock once you see all of your preferred customizations. Done perfectly. 
“How do you know my coffee order?” you ask. 
“I took the label off the old one,” she says, showing you the sticker in the palm of her hand. “Want to sit?” She points to the array of round tables within the cafe.  
“I don’t even know you,” you say slowly. I called in sick to work for you, it’s a little too late for that. 
The brunette woman laughs before holding out her hand for you to shake. “Hi, I’m Wanda,” she says. 
“Y/N,” you respond, shaking her outstretched hand as your face flushes slightly at its softness. 
“See? Now we know each other,” Wanda says cheekily. 
You nod with a shy smile, following her to the table in the back as the two of you settle down into a small conversation. 
Somehow, the two of you spend the rest of the day talking and laughing, and you think it might be the best day of your life. 
Little do you know, Wanda thinks so too.
part two: so american
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eccentricwritingbaby · 4 months ago
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arm candy
lando norris x reader
summary - enemies to lovers as the two embark on a pr relationship. reader is heavily based on cristina yang and olivia pope - intelligent and knows her worth. lando treats her as just a piece of ass on his arm. the two need to keep up appearances, yet always have time to find a fight. 
masterlist
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-
“i’m sorry,” you can’t help but laugh into the conference room, “you want me to what?” your father just sighs across from you in his seat, already knowing his head strong daughter would make a fuss over this. 
“y/n…” he starts, but you shoot him a look to stop, quickly. 
“i’m sorry, are you my pimp or my father?” you ask with a mocking behavior. 
“stop, y/n,” he grits out, “stop it,”
“fine,” you shrug, rolling your eyes. 
the room was filled with five people. your father, you, adam norris, lando norris, and some mean little woman who came in meaning business and barking orders. you respected her. 
your dad and lando’s dad had been business associates for a long time, never close friends, but acquaintances nonetheless. you had never met lando before, but had definitely heard about his escapades. 
“listen,” the woman starts again, “lando needs someone normal and successful on his arm, not anymore models or influencers that last only a day and alter his image, his image needs to be clean, squeaky clean,”
“oh my god,” you laugh out in disbelief, “i can’t believe i went to an ivy university just to be someone’s high end hooker-”
“Y/N!” you dad stands from his chair, “that’s enough out of you,”
“dad, this is ridiculous-”
“no its not, it’s business,” he stands firmly on his ground, “it’s four months of fake fucking dating just suck it up and do it,”
“fine,” you mumble out, “but only for you,”
your dad takes his seat again, grumbling out a few apologies to lando and his father along with the woman. they all just nod their head as she moves along with certain details. you finally look up from where you were fiddling with your fingers, making eye contact with your new ‘boyfriend’. he sends you a quiet look of reassurance, most likely that he didn’t want to be there either. you both give each other a smile, and your mind hopes that this might be okay. 
-
“so,” lando starts, attempting to break the tension on your first fake date.
“so,” you laugh, “how are you?”
“i think we can skip the pleasantries, y/n,” he chuckles, “we’ve technically been dating for four months?”
“oh right,” you continue to play along, “met you one week ago, but we’re madly in love,”
lando chuckles into his drink before the waiter comes over to get you started. once ordered, lando glances up at you, and you can’t help but find the small twinkle in his eye adorable. and then he speaks.
“you look like someone who i would go out with, without your personality, though”
“what’s that supposed to mean?” you question in offense.
“i mean usually my type is-”
“girls with half a brain?” you attempt to finish for him, but he just sharpens his gaze in your direction, eyebrows furrowing at your accusation.
“no,” he denies, “just girls who are a bit quieter,”
“so, pushovers?”
“not exactly,”
“you just want a little hot minion to control?”
“no,” he tries again, attempting to find the right words, “someone who isn’t rude,”
“oh you think i’m rude?”
“did you hear yourself in the meeting? talking to your dad like that? acting like the smartest person in the room-”
“i was the smartest person in that room,” you bite back to him, “and i’m sorry i didn’t enjoy the action of being pimped out, it’s offensive to my degrees and accomplishments-”
“you aren’t being pimped out, it’s a favor-”
“oh,” you scoff, “a favor?”
“yes, a favor, you probably aren’t used to hearing that word because you’re so self-centered,” he pushes.
“and here’s two words you do probably hear often, fuck off,”
“the rest of this dinner will be in silence,” lando directs to you, the waiter now coming over with your food. 
“finally, something we can agree on,”
-
you and lando had now been fake dating for two months. you came and went from his races, he was here and there at events in your honor, you both were successfully fulfilling your duties. the public was eating it up, excited that lando was in his ‘boyfriend era’. you both in reality were still finding each other difficult. lando found you to be pretentious and rude, you found lando to be a spoiled dick. but that was all pushed aside when it came to being in public. 
you heard the knuckles wrap on your door, and you attempt to brush the tears from your eyes swiftly. shit. you had lost track of time while on the phone with your mom, well, arguing with your mom. you forgot that lando was meeting you at your apartment soon to take a pre scheduled outing. getting up after hearing the knock once more, you make your way to open the door. 
“hey,” he grunts out, before he looks at your reddened eyes, “what’s wrong?” his tone softens with the question. 
“nothing,” you brush off, “let me just redo my makeup and i’ll be ready to go,”
“wait, y/n,” lando stops you from leaving the room, “talk to me, what’s going on?”
“you don’t want to hear about this, lan,” he catches himself smiling at the nickname that slipped off your tongue. 
“i have a heart, y’know,” he jokes quietly to you, bringing his hand up to give you a slight poke in the ribs. 
“no, really?” you ask sarcastically.
“yes, now talk to me,” he laughs to you, still trying to break you out of your shell. 
“it’s just the divorce,” you shake your head, “my parents have made me their middle man since they’ve been separated, and now i have to be my sibling's therapist too,” you choke up, trying to swallow back your tears. 
“i’m sorry, y/n,” lando moves forward, beginning to wrap his arms around you. 
“i’ve just gotta be there for everyone,” you sigh, “it’s been like that since i was a kid, i’ll be fine,”
“well,” lando starts, “i can be there for you,”
“like hell,” you laugh off, starting your trek to the bathroom.
“i’m serious,” lando pushes, “i know we’re at each other's throats, but if you need anything, you can talk to me,”
“thanks,” you squeak out, “you’re not so bad, norris,”
“why thank you, y/l/n. you’re not so bad yourself,”
-
it was race day, and you were actually excited. you and lando had a breakthrough the night he caught you crying. you both finally broke down the wall that divided and protected your hearts. you were feeling better about spending the next few months with him, it was going to be a relief to actually enjoy it. 
“are you ready, y/n?” lando calls out from the other room. 
“yeah!” you shout back, sliding your left foot into your final shoe. lando steps out of the room, dripped head to toe in papaya, bag slung lightly over his shoulder. 
“you look great,” he lets go of the compliment and you find yourself blushing, choosing to stare down at your feet instead of making eye contact. lando holds his hand you and you grasp it eagerly, readying yourselves for the show about to be put on. or was it a show?
once at the track, your hands finally separate as he heads to the garage and you move towards where his father was standing. 
“hey, mr. norris,” you greet with a smile at the older gentleman.
“please, y/n. how many times do i have to tell you to call me adam?” he chuckles with you. 
“i’m sorry, it’s just too unnatural for me,”
“well please, try,” you continue with your laughs, “mr. norris is my father,”
“alright,” you giggle, cringing a bit before squeaking out, “adam,”
“there we go!” you both joke around a bit more before a certain curly-haired mclaren driver is jogging over to you both.
“hey, dad,” he greets adam with a quick pat to his shoulder, “can i steal her for a second?” adam nods, giving you both some space as lando starts dragging you over to a quieter area.
“what’s up, lan?” you ask him, a bit of concern in your voice since you were unsure of what was going on. 
“i need to talk to you,” he sighs out, eyes holding an emotion you couldn’t put a finger on.
“what’s going on? are you okay?”
“yeah, yeah,” he shakes off, now grabbing your hands in his, “i just- i just-”
“LANDO!” his engineer calls from the garage behind him, “WE NEED YOU IN THE CAR!”
“TWO SECONDS!” he yells back over his shoulder, now turning back to face you, “listen, i really like you,”
“oh,” your eyes widen in surprise but lando just keeps rambling. 
“and not in this fake, bullshit way. i want to really take you out even if you drive me crazy sometimes,”
“lando-” you try to cut him off, but he just keeps going. 
“i can’t handle your rejection before i race so, if you’re by the gate after i finish, i’ll take it as you feel the same way,” taking a deep breath after his confession, lando leans in, kissing you roughly before pulling away and running back to the garage. you stand there for a moment, trying to process what had happened before a smile breaks out across your face. 
lando came in fourth. you cheered and cried, jumped up and down with his family and friends, and then you took off. you started your sprint to the gate, ready to meet him and finally bask in your own happiness. ready to choose yourself for once. 
you rush towards the wall just as lando is climbing out of his car. his head whips around to the barrier, searching for your face. once spotted, he breaks out in a similar sprint as you did, rushing towards you for a hug. you breathe in the moment, you and lando holding each other, for real this time, finally. 
-
you both were a giggly mess as you made your way back to the hotel room. 
“you’re coming out tonight, right?” he asks, arms not leaving your waist since you had left the paddock. 
“yeah, i’m coming,” you reply, brushing your hands up and down his arms that were wrapped around your middle. 
“okay, good,” his forehead meets yours, relishing in the feeling of you being in his arms, in private, “so my room or yours tonight?” he asks in a joking tone, referring to the two bedroom suite you were in. 
“mine,” you laugh quietly, “it smells better,” you poke him in the stomach a bit and he just chuckles with you. 
“you don’t like the smell of my race gear, love?” 
“no thank you, sir,”
“alright, well go get ready, and we’ll head out in about an hour?” lando shoo’s you to your room, patting your bum as you turn around, causing you to blush as you exit. 
later, at the club, you’re seated in the vip area with some of the drivers and a few friends. lando’s arm has been wrapped around your shoulder or waist all night, the tension between you two turning slowly from annoyance to lust. kisses stolen when they can be, waist being squeezed, and overall eye contact has made you a puddle in lando’s hands. you were falling for him, deeply. and you could tell he was too. until. he spoke. 
“that’s a nice lady you’ve got on your arm there, lando,” one of the guys in the section shouts to your boyfriend. 
“thanks, mate,” he shouts back, pulling you closer into his side. the man approaches the both of you, beginning to chat to lando about his race earlier. your mind quietly drifts out of the conversation, before you’re pulled back in as the man, now learning his name to be jack, introduces you to his girlfriend. the both of them were very fitting for each other, eyes wide open with nothing going on behind them. 
you strike up a conversation with the woman in front you about her shoes, before glance over and finding your boyfriend eyeing her up and down with ease. he catches your eyes and looks away, his arm pulling you in even closer than before. you just scoff in his direction and begin to get up from your seating. lando lets out a quick apology to the couple in front of you before chasing after you out of the vip section.
“y/n! wait! where are you going?” he shouts over the music and into your ear.
“i’m leaving,” you grunt out, continuing pushing past people in your pursuit for the exit. 
“why?”
“oh please,” you let out a laugh, finally reaching your destination and swiftly leaving the building. now in a quieter atmosphere, lando drops his voice and grabs you, forcing you to look at him, “i saw you looking, lando,”
“what? at the girl with jack?”
“yeah, i saw you checking her out,” your face hardens, morphing into the one you sported the first two months of getting to know lando. the one you had on when you didn’t like him, scaring the man in front of you as he watches, “i thought you were different, but i guess then again, people never change-”
“stop, y/n,” lando sternly speaks, “i am different, i like you. not her,”
“funny way of showing it,” you laugh, “i mean the both of them couldn’t even handle an intelligent conversation if they tried,”
“it always comes back to this with you doesn’t it?” he asks, now pushing you towards his car and retrieving his keys. 
“what does that mean?”
“you always have to be the smartest, huh?”
“that’s not what that is,” you shake him off, the both of you now entering his car before you continue, “it’s just embarrassing that you would prefer beauty over brains,”
“i don’t do that,” he whips his head around to face you, “i just appreciate attractive women, are you saying smart women can’t also be attractive?”
“don’t twist my words,” you shoot back, “just drive the damn car,”
-
“i cannot stand you when you’re like this,” lando grunts out as you arrive back into your hotel room. 
“like what?” you push back, moving to place your hands on your hips in defiance, ready for the fight about to unfold. 
“a-an arrogant, selfish, cocky-” he starts to stutter out his list, but you promptly cut him off. 
“it sounds like you’re describing yourself there,”
“no, that’s all you,”
“oh really?” you taunt, your eyes boring into his with fire, “says the guy who has only one race win under his belt but acts like he’s big shit-”
“SHUT UP!” he screams out at you, but you only push him further. 
“you want to call me arrogant, baby, we both are. it’s the only fucking thing we have in common,” you mockingly laugh in his direction, his head now fuming.
“you’re so-”
“right? correct? because i am. we both are arrogant and confident however the hell you want to spin it, who the fuck says that’s a bad thing?” you ask him as his eyes start to soften, “and i am not arrogant. i’m good at what i do, that is a simple fact,” you huff, catching your breath after your anger begins to cool. 
“you are right,” he sighs, “i guess we’re so alike that we didn’t even notice,”
“i am not like you,” you shake your head.
“and why would that be such a bad thing? you met me at the gate, remember?”
“because i am not some womanizer who just uses girls, not taking one glance at anything but their tits,” you snap at him. 
“i didn’t use you, and you know i think you’re beautiful, y/n,” lando attempts to calm the situation, but it only riles you up further.
“oh fuck that,” you spit out, lando taking a step back from you in surprise at your reaction, “fuck beautiful, if you want to compliment me,” you sneer in his direction, bringing up a finger to point in his face, “compliment my brain,” with your final say, you turn quickly on your heel in order to walk out the door. 
“y/n!” lando shouts, “stop,” he jogs over to you, grabbing your arm and moving your body to face him, “listen, i’m sorry,” he sighs, his free hand not wrapped around your arm running down his face, “i know you’re pretty good at what you do,”
“pretty good?” you scoff, “i’m great,”
“i’m trying to apologize here,”
“then apologize, correctly,” you emphasize, sharpening your gaze at him, “and don’t be sorry, be better,”
“that’s what i’m trying to say,” lando pleads, “i’m trying to tell you that i will be better,” 
“don’t tell me, show me,” you push, “i’m not your little play thing, lando. i’m not one of your little side hoes with no brain and just eyes for your money,” he scoffs at your vulgar words, but let’s you continue, “i have my own money and my own brain. i am not a body and face to just show up on your arm, you want me like you say you want me?” you rhetorically ask him, inching your face closer to his, “you have to earn me,”
“i will earn you, y/n. i want to earn you,”
“acting like this won’t get you there. i deserve better,”
“i will be better,” now with your faces inches apart, trading breath from each other’s mouths, you and lando finally quiet your everlasting argument, “let me show you, please,”
“i don’t know you, i don’t know if you’ll just say this and then go back to being a dick when you get bored,” you release your insecurities to him, his eyes softening at your vulnerability - something you rarely let out. 
“do you know who anyone really is?” he asks you, voice now quiet and gentle as his hand that was gripping your arm now begins to softly stroke it, “that’s the beauty of life, y/n,”
“getting hurt?”
“no,” he shakes his head with a laugh, “the unknown,”
“i don’t like not knowing,” you sigh, your soft side now coming out fully.
“i know,” he breathes out, “you’ve always had your entire life planned for you, y/n. it’s time you just relax, and have the ability to be surprised,”
“but what if i do get hurt?”
“with me around?” he chuckles, moving a centimeter away from your face, “that won’t happen,” he gives your forehead a light peck, “and if it does,” now a peck on your nose, “i’ll be around to help you,” and finally your lips. you give a hum of appreciation to his lips, basking in the warmth they gave you. finally separating in order to catch your breath, your foreheads rest together, eyes never leaving the others, “you don’t have to be alone anymore, y/n. you don’t have to do it all by yourself,”
“thank you,” you sigh, tears beginning to form in your waterline, “for everything,”
“no, thank you,” he replies back quickly, “for bringing me back down to earth,”
“i’ll always be around to humble you,” you giggle in his arms as he laughs with you.
“and i, you,”
-
a/n - this is not proofread so i'm so sorry if its a rambling mess, i just had the idea and wanted to write it up before i lost it
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sinofwriting · 1 year ago
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listen, please - Daniel Ricciardo
Words: 316 Summary: Daniel and his girlfriend break the news of their relationship and cause quite a splash with their age difference. (Social Media AU + Blurb) (Olivia Rodrigo as faceclaim and uses her music for reader’s)
Masterlist | Support Me! | listen, please verse
yourusername
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liked by dan_nigro, etnews, landonorris, and 548,752 others tagged: danielricciardo yourusername: I learned from my mistakes and finally listened to them. And thank god they were right about you.
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danielricciardo: forever happy they were ⤷ yourusername: ♥️ user01: excuse me??? user02: Uh what? user03: I’m sorry, Daniel??? What are you doing here??? user04: When did this happen? user05: honey, no. he’s in his 30s user06: well, already counting the days for this ending user07: this is going to last all of a month user08: yourusername please, no. Taylor went through this already. Learn from her mistakes!!! user09: Am I the only one picking up on the lyrics from Vampire? We stan using our own lyrics to announce a relationship user10: can’t wait for Dear John yourusername’s version. Gonna be a bop. ⤷ user05: I will sob if she covers that or would’ve could’ve should’ve when this ends. ⤷ user11: will simply die user12: i’m an f1 girlie, but no. This ain’t it. Mick Schumacher is right there, yourusername. Or even Oscar. ⤷ user13: Lando is right there and you went for the nepo baby and a guy who already has a girlfriend ⤷ user12: he was an example! And nearly all the drivers are nepo babies in some way. ⤷ user03: so true user14: how are you going to be such a big swiftie, know the woman yourself and still date a man older than you and believe it’s going to work out?
danielricciardo
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liked by maxverstappen1, f1_wags, redbullracing, and 149,875 others tagged: yourusername danielricciardo: Over a year with this one and many more to come, Sweets
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yourusername: so many more to come ⤷ danielricciardo: 😉 maxverstappen1: never seen you happier ⤷ danielricciardo: love ya maxie! user01: first daniel isn’t racing and now he’s taken??? 2023 is the worst user02: daniel, she’s practically a child. What are you doing? user03: weirdo user04: she’s barely 20, what are you doing??? ⤷ user06: yourusername is 22. She’s not barely 20 ⤷ user04: yeah and she turned 22 like barely a month ago user05: Daniel, not like this. I beg user07: well him and pierre have something in common 😆 user08: she’s a baby!!! Get away from her!!! user09: disgusting. Absolutely disgusting user10: you guys are acting like she’s not an adult??? She’s literally in her twenties. ⤷ user04: and he’s in thirties. It’s fucking weird. user11: jail, sir. You go to jail now.
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liked by user01, user02, user03, and 2,451 others tagged: yourusername, danielricciardo f1_wags: New WAG Alert! Daniel Ricciardo just announced his relationship with Y/N, a three time grammy winner and musician.
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yourusername
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liked by dr3wines, zedd, charlesleclerc, and 462,345 others tagged: danielricciardo, dr3wines yourusername: Congrats on the new wine, Danny! Little sad that it will no longer be for just us and our baths together, but happy to see it be shared.
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danielricciardo: thank ya, sweets. danielricciardo: girl in the second picture is absolutely gorgeous danielricciardo: bath tonight? I’ve still got a few bottles ⤷ yourusername: I’ll always want a bath with you user01: why is his face on my feed user02: throwing up at their comments user03: well, this made me feel incredibly single charlesleclerc: another great wine. Thank you for convincing him to let me try it before the launch! ⤷ yourusername: of course!
user04: leave him!!!! He’s using you for free promo of his wine!!! user05: taylor must be pissed!
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liked by yelyahwilliams, taylorlautner, yourusername and 2,873,421 others tagged: yourusername, danielricciardo taylorswift: Was a pleasant surprise to see these two when I stepped off stage tonight. Lovely to see you guys and will see you again for dinner next week!
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yourusername: not a single better performer. Watching is you magic every single time. And dinner will be fun! danielricciardo: amazing show! user01: taylor??? user02: i’m sorry what user03: my 2023 bingo card is in shambles user04: living rn. all of you fuckers were saying that taylor was disappointed and now look. She knew before we did user05: some many clowns staying silent in these comments user06: i was at this show!!! Wyd mean that yourusername was there?
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liked by landonorris, f1_wags, sourandguts, and 187,392 others tagged: yourusername daniel3.jpg: my two favorite subjects: you and us
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landonorris: do you two do anything but take baths for date night? ⤷ daniel3.jpg: we do. Just like our baths y’know user01: um, i’m sorry. But that last photo user02: lando is so real. This is the second bath photo we’ve gotten ⤷ user03: i don’t want that water bill user04: gross user05: how do you feel comfortable posting this with how young she is? ⤷ user01: you’re acting like she’s a kid. She’s in her twenties. Fuck off user06: am i supposed to just act like i don’t know now that daniel likes car sex??? ⤷ user03: i’m doing my best to not think about it user07: daniel, thank you for feeding us.
Daniel could feel his grin grow, eyes softening, and his shoulders loosening all at the sound of her name. It takes him a moment to register the question, but when he does his grin grows more.
“I wasn’t really expecting it, you know? But she’s just great, I mean absolutely fantastic.” “And the age difference isn’t an issue?” The reporter presses, though more gently than expected. He scoffs, shaking his head. “No, not all. We want the same things in life and we both have very similar timelines for when we want them. We talked about all of that before we even went on a date and us wanting the same things, just helped finally take the next step.”
“And has the backlash affected you two at all?” “No.” Daniel smiles at the confused look the reporter gives him, letting out a chuckle. “We knew it was going to cause a splash. We’ve never ignored the age difference between us. It’s there and ignoring it wouldn’t do anything.” He pauses, “I understand why people are so concerned, there is a history of large age gaps not being great. But there’s also a history of them working out great, I’ve got plenty of examples in my personal life. Besides, it's not really the age difference that matters, it’s where you're at in life and what you want to come next. We just happen to be in the same place and want the same things to come next.”
The reporter is looking at him stunned before they finally manage to find their voice. “Thank you, Daniel.” “Of course, cheers mate.” He winks, before throwing up a hand to wave at the camera before he jogs off, already knowing that he’ll have a text or two from her calling him a sap over his lovesick grin. And he’d hate to not see them as soon as they came in.
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justmeinadaze · 2 months ago
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Inescapable Part 4 (Steddie X You)
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Warning with some notes: Warnings: Older (Early 30s) Prisoner Steddie & Young (Early 20s) Fem college student Y/N; Dom/Sub dynamics, SMUT, steddie get intimate, degrading (little boy, slut, etc), light choking and spanking, dirty talk, FLUFF, Y/N talks about Olivia.
ANGST *breathes it in like coffee*, Starts where the last chapter ended, father threatens all three, reader is smacked and threatened to never see them again, mentions of an arranged marriage, boys touch on their lives in prison and how they cope, some toxic behavior from the boys in regards to keeping the reader safe, guys are hurt and blood is mentioned, mentions of a rough birth but no real details are given (they're both fine <3), SLIGHT cliffhanger ending.
Word Count: 5474
Series here/Donate to me <3
“Here’s what’s going to happen.”, your father commands as he continues to glare their way. “You will stop speaking and all communications end today. If I catch even a single letter being sent her way, I will make you regret it. Am I being clear, boys?”
“We love her.”, Eddie answered causing your dad to roll his eyes as he rose to his feet.
“It seems what I’m saying isn’t sinking in.” Grabbing the metalhead’s hair, he roughly pressed his face down into the steel table making him grunt in pain as Steve pulled at his handcuffs to try and help to no avail. “All of that ends today. You will never see my daughter again or that baby. It’s my job to protect her and I’m not going to let you murder her like you did those other kids.”
“Dad, please.”, you beg. “I love them to.”
Your dad snickers slightly as he lets Eddie go before leaning against the wall and folding his arms. 
“Say your goodbyes now and just so you know she will be taken care of. Derek and I talked about it and after HIS baby is born, they will both get married and live happily ever after. Amen.”
Their eyes flick to you as the tears begin to flow again and you reach for their hands.
“I didn’t agree to that, I fucking swear. I love you both so much and I’ll always be here. I promise—” Tugging at your bicep, your father lifts you from your seat as you continue to try and cling to them. “NO! Dad, please! DON’T DO THIS!”
Guards come in to uncuff the boys as your dragged out of the room and into the hallway. Hearing your screams and pleading, awakes something primal in them both and all they can think about is getting to you. 
Steve elbows a guard in the face and shoves another out of the way as he runs down the hall but before he can reach you is tackled to the ground followed by Eddie who only got as far as outside the doorway. Feeling the same, you hit your dad’s chest hard enough for him to release you and you slide to the floor to be by their side. 
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry!”
Using all of his strength, one of Steve’s arms was freed and he reached out to pinch your cheeks, bringing your lips to his. 
“This isn’t over, honey. I promise. We’ll get to you.”
Eddie was able to wiggle out of the officers hold enough to wrap his arm around your neck and kiss your lips as well. 
“We love you, baby. Everything’s going to be ok.”
You began to sob harder when they were hit with something hard as you were lifted off the ground and carried out to your dad’s car. 
***
 As your father begins to drive away, you scream and kick at things in his truck until he pulls over to the side of the road. 
“Calm down right now and you listen to me, Y/N! I will not be the fucking embarrassment of this town. Do you fucking hear me?”
“You already crossed that bridge when you cheated on mom with the town slut in the back of your cruiser. I guess fucking criminals runs in the family.”, you spit. 
The sound of his palm hitting your cheek and your gasp that followed silenced you as you glared past him out the driver’s side window. 
“Listen to me and you listen good. You will stay away from those men or so help me God, Y/N, I will make sure they stay in there for the rest of their Goddamn lives. Do I make myself clear?” When you don’t answer he shouts, making you jump as he repeats his question. 
“Yes, sir.”, you grumble through gritted teeth. 
“You will marry Derek before the baby is born and then we will go back to all our normal routines like one big happy family.”
Folding your arms, you turn to lay your head against the glass as you continue to cry. 
####################
June 3rd, 1998
Steve’s nose scrunches in anger as he punches the boxing bag they keep in the gym of the prison. As he glances towards his friend, Eddie’s eyebrows raise in amusement. 
“Fuck off, Munson. Don’t give me that look.”
“I’m not looking at you in anyway, Harrington. I’m just…a little worried.”
“I know but what can we do trapped behind this fucking concrete wall.”, he grunts as he continues punching. 
“I meant I’m worried about you.”
Steve’s chest puffs out as he wipes the sweat from his forehead, ignoring his friend as he continues what he was doing. Abruptly, the metalhead takes hold of his arm and pulls him into the bathroom nearby. 
“You have to calm down.”, Eddie scolds.
“How the fuck can I be calm! It’s been a month with no word. No phone calls, letters, nothing. What if something happens to her or Olivia?!”
It was an automatic reaction, something both of them had done a few times over the years and more to calm the other. Taking ahold of Steve’s cheeks Eddie crashed his lips to his own, his fingers tangling in his hair before both men are panting as they rest their forehead against each other’s. 
“You think this doesn’t kill me to? But what can we do, Steve? We don’t have enough money to buy another night out.”
“We have enough to get to Canada.”
The metalhead’s eyes widen as he searches through his friends to see if he’s serious. 
“I thought we wanted to do this right? What life would she have?”, he whispers.
“What life would she have married to fucking Derek with her dad breathing down her neck?”
“Steve…I don’t know...”
“Munson! Harrington! Your lawyer is here to see you.”, a guard called sharply making them jump before quickly exiting the room. 
***
“Um, Bobby, where are we going?”, Eddie asks as they pass the interrogation rooms they usually meet with their lawyer in. 
The guard doesn’t say a word as he continues to lead them further down the hall and outside to a separate building they had never been to before. Both men brace, preparing for anything especially after the last few months they had before the man stops just outside of a cellblock door. 
It looked like every other one except this one had no window so people could peak in. 
“You have three hours to go over your case and anything else you may need.”, Bobby relays, looking around as he leans in to unhook their cuffs. “I told you guys I’m on your side. Three hours. Not one second longer.”
Their eyebrows furrowed as he opened the door but all confusion and worry evaporated when their eyes landed on you. 
Before you could say anything, you started to sob as you ran forward with Steve meeting you halfway as your arms wrapped around him. 
“I don’t…how…how are you here right now?”
“I had to come make sure you were ok.”, you hiccupped as you hugged Eddie next. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I’ve been trying to figure out how to get to you but my dad’s been a tyrant.”
Tilting you head back, the metalhead cupped your face as his thumbs tried to dry your eyes.
“He threatened to hurt you or keep you both in here longer and I was so scared.”
“Hey, hey. Don’t worry about that now. As long as nobody’s hurting you.” Ignoring him, you took hold of his thumb to bend his hand so you can place tender kisses on his palm. “Nobody’s hurting you right?”
Again, you didn’t answer and this time Steve intervened as he lightly but firmly gripped your jaw making you sigh.
“After we left you, my dad got mad when I told him he couldn’t stop me from loving you. Since then, his friends have been keeping an eye on me. Following me to school or back to my house. When I do my homework, sometimes they’ll show up to dig through my work to make sure I’m not writing you.”, you explain as you wipe your eyes and back away towards the bed. 
“My mom came down and tried to intervene but that didn’t go well. They fought and she couldn’t take it anymore so she went home. She offered to take me with her but I told her I couldn’t leave you.”
“Have you lost your mind?”, Steve scolded in a firm tone that had you sitting up straighter. “Take her offer and get out of here. You’d be safer and happier with her!”
Your anger fueled eyes glare his way. 
“I would NOT be happier. I would be just as miserable if not more because you wouldn’t be there!”
“We still won’t be there, sweetheart.”, Eddie sighs as he sits beside you and rubs your back. “We still have another 13years here but at least with your mom you could call and write.”
“No…no. Everyone else has abandoned you but I won’t.”, you declare making them swoon as he leans over kiss your cheek and Steve kneels in front of you taking your hands. 
When he rests his head against your stomach, he feels a little push causing him to jerk back as you giggle. 
“Yeah, she moves quite a bit now.” Taking both their hands, you place them where you felt her move and on cue she kicks her little feet against them. 
“Wow…”, Eddie breathes as his thumb rubs your skin. “Probably has a lot to say about all this. Don’t you, princess?”
Reaching into your bag, you hand them your new ultrasound and a big grin spreads across their faces as they take her in. 
“You see she has her little nose and these cute tiny hands.”, you beam as you point to things on the image. “Your, um, your uncle gave me a cassette of your band playing songs and Olivia just loves it. She wiggles around.”
The metalhead softly smiles your way before you both watch him stand and face the wall away from you. 
“Eddie?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m, um, I’m ok. I just need a minute.”, he chokes out causing you to rise and wrap your arms around him as you lean your head on his back. “I hate all this bullshit. We shouldn’t even be here! We did nothing wrong!”
You squeezed him tighter wishing you could take away his pain. This was the first time you were seeing this type of break but for Steve it was nothing new. They could hold things in pretty well until they couldn’t and that animosity would spill out, sometimes aggressively. 
“How can I help?”, you whisper.
“You can’t, Y/N. Not in your condition.”
“I’m pregnant, Steve, not broken.”, you giggle making both him chuckle with you. 
“Naw, baby girl, we know but sometimes in here our outlet is a bit different than what we did with you out there.”
“Come on, sweetheart. You’re a smart girl. Do you really need it spelled out?!”, Eddie snapped startling you as you let him go.
His dark eyes locked with yours and you could feel the other man’s practically boring into your skull as they waited for you to get to the realization on your own. 
“Oh.”, you squeaked in a little voice that had their heads tilting. “Is it…do you like it? I mean is it consensual?”
“That’s a stupid fucking question.”
“Hey.”, Steve growled towards his friend who exhaled through his nose as he looked away. “Yes, it’s consensual. We would never do anything to genuinely hurt the other. Like with you we have safe words and everything.”
“Is it intimacy or survival?”, you murmur, your tone getting smaller and smaller; you were dropping. 
“Does it matter?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Why?! So you can decide if you still love us or not?!”
The other man rose to his feet and suddenly took hold of Eddie’s throat. 
“Don’t talk to her that way. She’s trying to understand. Right, honey?”
“Yes, Daddy. I love you either way. I just want to know more. You never made any indication that—”
“We didn’t know if we could trust you.”, Steve responded before Eddie could. “It started as survival…needing someone to hold in the middle of the night when the lights go out. Needing to feel safe in a place that’s anything but. You touch yourself needing that release but after a while you want…NEED more.”
“People would make it into something it’s not.”, Eddie added. “Something dirty like the only reason we do this is because we’re in prison. It may be the reason it started but… us being rough with each other… it’s hard to explain and to be honest I don’t want to.”
“You don’t have to.”, you coo as you press up to kiss his lips. “Do you want me to give you some alone time? If this is between you two I don’t want to intrude.”
The metalhead’s hair lightly swats at his face as he shakes his head. 
“What do you need from me, Sir?”
“I want you to watch.”
Nodding, you kiss him again before turning to do the same with Steve and waddling to a chair next to the bed. After smiling comfortingly your way, he turns his body to face his friend. 
“Soft, rough or rough, rough?” 
“Both, I think.”
“Ok, baby. Use me.”, the pretty boy smirks as he sarcastically takes a bow with his arms wide open. 
Gripping his cheeks, Eddie crashes their lips together and a little sigh leaves your own as you watch them mingle together. When Steve’s arms came back down, they wrapped around the other boy’s waist, lifting him off his feet to walk with him towards the bed. After pushing the metalhead onto the mattress, Steve yanks off the man’s sweats and underwear before taking his cock in his hand and taking him into his mouth. 
“Fuck, Steven.”, Eddie groaned as he moved the boy’s hair away from his face to watch him. “All the way down. I know you can fuckin’ take it.”
At the sound of his light gags, the metalhead tightened his grip in his soft locks and guided his head lower to take him deeper. 
“That’s it. Choke on it. Choke on my dick, dirty boy.” Chocolate eyes flick to you as he notices you squirm in your seat and place your hands between your legs hoping to ease the ache. “You like this, Y/N? Watching him struggle to take all of me down his tight little throat?”
“Y-Yes, Sir. Does he feel good?”
“Jesus, you’re asking a lot of stupid fucking questions today. You’ve felt his mouth, you know how amazing it is.”
“I…I didn’t.” Eddie blinks as he tugs on Steve’s head, allowing him to catch his breath. “I only felt your tongue that night.”
“We’re going to correct that right now. Come here, baby.” With his arm steadying you behind your back, you removed your pants and kicked them to the side. “Go ahead and rest your back against the pillows.”, he instructed and you followed as you watched him pull Steve to his feet to undress him. 
Falling onto the mattress, Steve slithered on his stomach between your legs and his palms gripped your thighs. 
“Fuck, you smell so good.”, the man whimpered breathily as he pressed his nose to the cloth against your core. “Tell us if you need stop at any point, ok?”
“Ok, Daddy.”
Moving your panties to the side, his tongue pressed against your clit and a cry caught in your throat as the width of it seemed to envelope you.
“Oh my g—“, you moan as he licked between your folds in long, slow strokes that had your eyes roll shut as your fingers run through his hair much softer than the other man’s. Steve hums against you and the vibration has your eyes searching for the cause, landing on Eddie pushing two of his digits inside of the boy in front of him. 
“I told you, sweetheart. His mouth is fucking heaven especially in this hell.” When Eddie grumbles his last sentence, his hand comes down hard on Steve’s ass making him grunt and flick his tongue faster against your nub.  “Come on, dirty boy. Make our girl cum. Make her cum so I can fuck you like the slut you are.”
His fingers dug into your skin as the obscene sound of slurping filled the room till you shuddered and came against his tongue. Eddie spanked him again as Steve pushed up onto one of his palms while his other rested above your mound as his thumb rubbed slow circles against your bundle of nerves.
Your eyes continuously took in the little features on his face as the metalhead spit directly into his hole and gradually slid his cock into his entrance. Steve licked his lips as his head fell but you quickly grabbed his chin to lift it back up. 
“You…you look so handsome like this, Daddy.”
“Fuck.”, he mewled as Eddie took hold of his waist and thrust his hips. 
He seemed almost lost in what he was doing as he roughly pounded into him with each grunt that fell from the pretty boy’s mouth bordering the line between pleasure and pain with your gentle caresses a stark contrast. 
In the middle of everything, Steve’s eyes abruptly snapped open and you saw that primal look you had seen in them both when your dad was pulling you away from them. Gripping your thighs again, he pushed them open flat against the bed and lobbed a huge glob of spit into your cunt before pumping two of his long, thick fingers inside of you. 
Your own eyes closed until you gasped at the feeling of a tongue against your clit immediately recognizing it wasn’t Steve but Eddie. Laying his chest onto the man’s back, he leaned his head against his shoulder as his mouth played with you.
“Fuck…I’ll never get over how…sweet she is. Don’t…Don’t stop fingering her, Steven! Or I swear to God.”, the metalhead growled through gritted teeth. “Make her cum again, little boy. That’s it…thrust those fingers so fucking deep. Shit—you’re just as tight as her.”
“More.”, you begged and Eddie obliged as he fell into you again to flick your nub with his tongue as he rolled his cock into the man beneath him. “I’m…”
As the ball dropped and they helped you through your orgasm, Steve offered his digits to his friend who eagerly licked them clean. Pushing back onto his knees, he chased their highs as you limply slid your body under the pretty boy and he rested his face in the nook of your neck. 
“How does he feel, Daddy?”
“Mmph—good.” Your lips delicately kissed his until you felt his face scrunch as his sweaty forehead fell against your skin. “Fuck, baby.”
At his shaky breath, one of his hands reached down to stroke his cock till you felt his release land on your thigh. Eddie’s palm took hold of the man’s throat as he pulled him closer to his chest and kissed him much softer than he had been. 
“Thank you. Thank you so much…for everything…sweetheart. Mmugh—fuck, I’m gonna cum.”
Steve nodded and as he clung his arms around him, the metalhead grunted as he pounded his release into the boy beneath him. 
Their heavy pants filled the room as they stayed like that and you waited patiently for them to collect their bearings. 
Steve was the one to move first, crawling forward, and collecting you in his arms as his head hit the pillow. Eddie silently went to work cleaning his friend and then you before laying down in front of you so he could take your hand in his. 
“Thank you for trusting me enough to show me that. If you ever want to be intimate in front of me or without me…I don’t mind.”
The metalhead’s palm gently pets your head as he leans forward to kiss your forehead. When your eyes meet his, you notice a deep pain within them that breaks your heart. 
“We don’t really think too much about it but I do know that when I hear him cry at night I feel so helpless. When I hold him and kiss him, it makes me feel safe to. Like I have some control, you know?”
“Have you considered thinking about it?”
The metalhead knew what you meant, nodding as his fingers caressed your cheek. 
“We can’t in here. People exploit that.”
“Do they exploit that when it comes to me?”
“No…probably because they know we would fucking kill anyone that came after you or hurt you.”
His beautiful eyes darkened and Steve pushes up on his elbow to glance over your face. 
“Anyone?”
“Anyone, sweetheart. Any convict. Any Ex. Any…tyrant.”
You should be afraid…but you’re not.
You should be disgusted that they would kill someone for you…but you weren’t. 
You should hate men like them…but you didn’t.
Shaking your head, you curl yourself closer into the Steve’s chest as your arms reached for Eddie who scooted as close to your body as he could. 
“We’d never hurt you, Y/N. I hope you know that.”, the pretty boy whispered as he kissed your shoulder. 
“Or anyone else, unless you felt unsafe or in danger.”
A light knock doesn’t stir any of you as you continue to stare into those chocolate eyes in front of you. 
“Do you feel unsafe?”
“15 more minutes, guys.”, the guard informed you without opening the door. 
“No, Sir.”
“Do you trust us to protect you if you were in danger?”
“Yes, Daddy.”
It takes a couple more moments but when their eyes do finally soften, they lean in to hug you tightly and kiss your lips. 
##########################
June 14th, 1998
“Munson! Harrington! Ya’ll have a visitor!”
Both men exchange a glance as they stand up from their beds and allow the guard to lead them towards the integration rooms. 
“She wouldn’t come this soon right?”, Steve whispered. 
“I don’t think so.”
The person leading them tugged their chain, signaling them to be quiet before heading outside to where they had yard time during the afternoons. Right now, it was pitch black as they had begun getting ready for bed for the evening but they didn’t think anything out of the ordinary until they were pulled into the weight room and were met with a couple of fists to their faces. 
“You know, you both are stubborn just like Y/N.”, your dad sasses as he stands up from the bench he had been waiting on. “I see why she likes you.”
A few of the guards pull both boys up to their knees and turn them to face him. 
“She’s not as crafty as she thinks she is. She did slip away for a while but one of my officers did catch her leaving this facility so—”
“If you hurt her—” Another fist interrupts, Eddie as he grunts and spits blood onto the floor. 
“Who let her in? Which guard is it?”
The fuck you that Steve answers with didn’t help the situation as he was kicked in the stomach hard and toppled over. 
“You know, she may hate me but one day she will thank me. She may think you’re innocent but I’ve seen what you did; the pain you inflicted on those people. I will not let my daughter die because of some stupid crush.”
“So you’d force her to be with someone she doesn’t like?”, the metalhead growled before being hit again. 
“If it keeps her alive and me respected than yes.”
A snarky, deep laugh left Steve’s lips as his head tilted back to stare at your father.
“That’s what it really is, isn’t it? You don’t give a fuck about her. All that matters is image and how you look. Oh, I know all about that being a Harrington.”
Your dad stepped forward and reached out to pull the man’s hair causing him to wince slightly as his jaw clenched. 
“There he is. I was wondering when I’d meet the serial killers and not the ‘poor me’ image you display for the world. Has Y/N seen this side of you yet?”
“Outside or in the bedroom?”
Steve was punched much harder than before making Eddie snicker hoping to distract them.
“She hasn’t and she never will until you give us a reason to.”
“Don’t you mean unless?”
“That’s up to you.”
A little hm noise left your dad’s mouth as he smiled and stepped away. 
“Y/N had her baby a couple of days ago.” Both their eyes snapped his way as his grin grew. “She named her Olivia Y/L/N. She wanted to give her your last names but I forbade it. I was going to put Derek’s last name but…I figured I’d give her this especially after the birth.”
“Are they ok—ugh!”
“Oh, Mr. Munson, what happened? Not so sarcastic now are we? Here’s what’s going to happen. Since my daughter disobeyed, you will be punished. I’m thinking for Mr. Munson here, Indianapolis. That’s where your father is right? And Mr. Harrington how about Washington? I think that’s far enough away.”
At the sound of both men’s shouts his way, your father smirked as he headed out the door. 
“Enjoy your last night together, gentlemen.”
***
Monitors continually to beep as your eyes fluttered open.  You were still incredibly exhausted after rushing to the hospital and being in labor for as long as you were before Olivia decided to grace the world with her presence.
Olivia.
“Hey, hey, no. Don’t move. What do you need?”, Derek asked as you began to sit up. He sighed when you ignored him to reach for the crib and touch your daughter’s cheek to make sure she was ok. “The doctor said you should rest and take these…”
As he reached his hand out to give you some pills, you swatted them away across the room. 
“Y/N, I���m trying to help.”
“Fuck you.”
Exhaling, he took a seat by the foot of your bed and you immediately curled into yourself so he wouldn’t touch you.
“I didn’t know what to do. Your dad said if I did this he could help my family. We are in so much debt and my mom is about to go bankrupt. I could get kicked out of school and my family could lose their house—”
“So you agreed to settle down and ruin my life, you selfish asshole.”
“I’M selfish!?”, he hissed. “You brought an innocent baby into this world who has no idea her father is fucking murderer. And what, you were just going to raise her by yourself till she was 13 in a town where she will be ostracized?! She deserves better.”
“Fuck you. You are NOT Olivia’s father.”, you growl.
Derek’s eyes darken in anger as he rises to his feet. 
“Whether you like it or not I am now and next week you’re going to be my wife so it’s time you start accepting that fact. You did…once.”
As soon as he leaves, you lay your head back and sob. A part of you knew he was right; that Olivia deserved better but she deserved Eddie and Steve. Two men who loved her and you and shouldn’t have been placed in the position they were in. 
The sound of the baby cooing grabbed your attention but as you shifted in bed a palm roughly covered your mouth. Your wide, fearful eyes locked with Eddie’s as he slowly placed his finger over his month and gestured towards the door where you saw Steve waiting.
Rapidly taking them in, they both had cuts and bruises on their face that looked fresh. The metalhead himself had a pool of blood on his shirt and when you reached out to touch it, it was wet and he didn’t flinch. 
It wasn’t his.
Olivia whined again as both your eyes fleeted in that direction. 
“Miss Y/N?”, one of the officer’s asked from down the hall. “Baby is making noise.”
“Shhhhhhh!”, a nurse loudly calls towards him making him huff. 
“How is girl going to be a mom when she sleeps through a baby crying—”
As the man stepped into the room, Steve wrapped his arm around his neck in chokehold till the man stopped struggling and slumped to the floor. 
“Are you both ok?”, Eddie whispers as he lifts his palm while you watch his friend begin to remove the cop’s uniform. “Y/N, look at me, baby.”
“Wha-Wha-What’s happening?”
“We don’t really have time to explain right now but we can after we start getting where we are going. Can you move?”
As Steve put on the jacket, he tucked the gun into his pants and continued to search for something but for what you weren’t sure. 
“Y/N!”, Eddie growls in a low rumble that makes you jump before he exhales trying to control his temper. “Sweetheart, we don’t have a lot of time for this. Do you want to come with us or not?”
“I-I-I can walk but—but not fast. I need medication.”
The other boy grabs your chart and flashes it towards his friend who nods. 
“Does Olivia need anything from the doctor?” 
When you shake your head, Steve abruptly kneels in front of you and slides some scrub pants along your legs. 
“What happened to your faces?”
“Ok, honey, I’m going to carry you and Ed’s going to get the baby. Ready?”
“Answer one of my—!”
This time the pretty boy’s palm silenced you when you raised your voice, his own angry irises glaring into yours. 
“You have to be quiet, Y/N.”, he grunts in annoyance before sighing and moving his hand to caress your cheek. “Your father caught you leaving the prison.”
That’s all you needed to hear as it suddenly felt like you couldn’t breathe and the machines around you began to beep. 
Leaning his forehead on yours, he began to inhale and exhale with you, guiding you as you felt Eddie kiss your temple. 
“Miss Y/L/N? Everything ok?”, the intercom cackled. 
“Um, yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I just had…had a nightmare.”
“Do you need something to help you go back to sleep?”
“No, ma’am. I’ll be alright. Thank you.”
The three of you wait and Steve hands his friend the scrubs he found as he gently lifts you off the bed to place you in a chair nearby. You watch as he grabs the officer and nervously takes off everything attached to you before hooking it to the unconscious man. When the monitors continue to beep steadily, he grins. 
“Oh, I know, princess, I know. Daddy’s got you.”, Eddie murmurs softly as he lifts the baby into his arms. 
As you try to stand, the world spins and you fall back down right as Steve catches your wrist.
“Are you ok?”
“Yeah, I just…just need to sleep…”
Nodding, Steve pushes the cap down on his head and blocks as much of his eyes as he can while Eddie puts a face mask over his mouth. Pointing towards the wheelchair, he hastily puts you into it and begins exiting the room. 
“Are there any other officers you’re aware of around here, Y/N?”, he whispers.
“I don’t know…but I’ve…only ever seen one.”
“Excuse me.”, the nurse calls. “Where are you taking her?”
“I, uh…”
“I wanted to get some…air. Is…that ok?! I know my father has me…fucking shackled here but I can still move around! I’m bringing this asshole…is that…ok?!”, you shouted as best you could. 
The lady eyes you up and down before standing to head to a cart next to her. 
“Take this before you go. The last thing we need is you getting an infection or something. And don’t be out there with that little one too long. She needs to rest to.”, she instructs as she hands you a cup of water to swallow your pill. 
“How much more rest does she need?”, Steve asks, absently gesturing your way while trying to hide his genuine concern. 
“She’ll be ready physically within the next couple of days and you guys hounding me constantly about that won’t heal her any faster! Jesus.”
Rolling his eyes, he continues forward to the elevator and all three of you exhale a sigh of relief as the doors close around you. 
“Do you think you can hold her, Y/N?”
“Where are you going?”, Eddie asks as he gently hands you Olivia. 
“I’m going to run to the third floor to grab her meds. Find us a car and I’ll meet you out front.”
###############
@lemme-slytherin-that-dick @micheledawn1975 @paleidiot @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @noooah @baileebear @dashingdeb16 @nailbatanddungeon @rockmusiciscalming12 @mikeyswifie @poofyloofy @eddiexmunsonlover @dreamliners @munsonmoonshine86 @bexreadstoomuch @kitkat80 @myherometalhead @hardladyheart @sheisjoeschateau @chelebelletx
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shadowbriar · 11 months ago
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James Potter - Traitor
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Pairing : James Potter x (she/her) Reader Word Count : 1.9k Warning : Cliffhanger (sort of). Not proofread as always. Synopsis : As gracious and angelic Lily Evans is, she couldn’t help but to see her as some villain who might steal him away. Notes : Inspired by this request and Olivia Rodrigo - Traitor. Pretty sort as I don't know if anon would like a happy or sad ending? If you like this story and would like to support me, please visit my kofi page and perhaps get me a coffee?☕ James Potter's Masterlist click here. Taglist : @jsjcue @ell0ra-br3kk3r @sofiacblair @coffeehurricanes @ineedmentalhelp123
She should’ve known better. She should’ve known that when he pulled that stunt at the Great Hall, proclaiming his feelings and just how desperate he’s been to get her attention, that it was only a projection of the words he wanted to confess to another. She should’ve known that when he looked at her with those eyes that were filled with love, it would never compare to the affection he hoards for another. She should’ve known that with every promise, every sweet nonsense he whispered to her ears, they were truly addressed for another.
The signs were laid bare for her to see. From the way he stopped holding her hands in the hallway to making up excuses and cancelling their dates. His kisses have turned into quick pecks before they’re gone altogether. The jokes he used to share have stopped coming. Dissipating into thin air with no warning.
Supposedly it was her fault. She should’ve said something, calling him out from the lack of effort he’s been showing but she knew she was pulling on a thin thread. Their relationship has always been based on a frail foundation. She knew that deep down there was no other woman that could topple his first love, so she kept quiet. Crying herself to sleep and praying to whoever might listen out there to help salvage their relationship. Anything to keep him just a little bit longer.
“Love, you left your hair tie in my room,” James says once he takes a seat, busying himself with the stack of pancakes in front of him.
She takes the unassuming item and examines it. This hair tie wasn’t hers. She doesn’t have bright orange hair ties, “This isn’t mine, James.”
“Oh,” He responded, taking the item and placing it in his pocket nonchalantly “Must be Lily’s then.”
“Lily?”
“Yeah, we had an impromptu study session last night after our rounds. She helped me with my potion essays.”
“But we promised to do that essay together,” She says, forcing a smile as she tries her best to conceal her disappointment and heartbreak “I waited for you to have some free time so we can work on it together.”
“Yes well, like I said, it was an impromptu session. We finished our rounds earlier than expected so we figured we could use the free time to do the assignment.” He explained, still oblivious to the harm done to her heart “Shouldn’t you be proud I’ve finally managed to finish an assignment earlier than due? This is a huge improvement for me, don’t you think?”
Her head nods, another pretend smile decorating her face. James looks happy and proud of his achievement. It was true. When else would you find James Potter diligently working his schoolwork? He’s always been one of those students who waits for the adrenaline rush of working everything at the last minute. He’s brilliant, perhaps too brilliant to ever spare an hour in revising his notes and making flashcards for the upcoming exams, so this certainly is a huge improvement to celebrate for. If only it wasn’t because of Lily.
“You’ve been spending more time with Lily, lately.” She points out. Her hands were shaking, knowing that the pool she’s stepping in might be deeper than it seems and she might not know how to swim to the shore but she needed to start somewhere. She needs to save their relationship somehow.
James’ brows furrow, a slight sign of disagreement, “Not really. Our rounds just happened to be scheduled together a lot this month.”
“Well, you also cancelled our study date last week for her.”
“Yeah, that’s because she needed my help with Divination.”
A rude laughter escapes her, “You’re the worst from our House in Divination, James. She doesn’t need your help.”
“Where are you going with this?” He finally snaps, turning to face her with evident annoyance in his eyes “I thought you would be happy with me finally trying to fix my grades.”
“I am. I just didn’t realise that needed to be done by increasing the amount of time you share with your ex-crush.”
“Oh, so you’re jealous?”
She was quiet now. Sure it was jealousy that plagued her mind the first time he began drifting away but these days, these days she’s only been insecure and worried for their sinking ship. Anxiety over the chance of her being replaced by someone who has always had his heart has been haunting her nights. As gracious and angelic Lily Evans is, she couldn’t help but to see her as some villain who might steal him away.
“You’re being paranoid, again.” James scoffs, turning completely blind and deaf to her silent agony “There’s nothing going on between me and Lily. I’m trying to fix my grades for me. She just happens to be a great teacher and companion to help me study.”
She's still quiet, weighing if she should believe his words.
"Please, I don't want to fight," James sighs, dropping the fork on his hand and taking hers to show his sincerity "She's just a friend, I promise."
There was truly nothing left for her to say that wouldn’t act as petrol to their burning bridge. James wasn’t listening. For a while now he hasn’t truly cared about a word she’s said and it was painful to finally understand this. That he might never have been as sincere as she thought him to be. Or perhaps he did, once, yet that feeling has died a long time ago with no chance of revival. His feelings for her have withered, faded into nothingness.
And it’s only a matter of time before the flame in her heart dies too.
—-
It was a nasty fall.
She couldn’t remember the last time she felt this much worry and cried so much from something Madam Promfrey claims as ‘nothing but a light nudge on the head’, but she was there when the bludger hit his head. She was there when James began losing balance of his broom and falling to the hard ground. She was there when the team crowd around their passed out captain.
Her eyes were getting heavy now. The watch on her wrist has shown that she has skipped dinner a few hours ago. Some of the lights on the hospital wing have been turned off, making the hall darker as night falls deeper. If it wasn’t for the boys coming to visit James half an hour ago, she would be left starving and secretly creeped out by the eerie feeling of the infirmary.
“You should get some rest, Love, you’ve been waiting here for hours.” Remus advises, giving her shoulder a slight squeeze.
“He should be up anytime soon, now,” She reasoned as she looked up to see the tall boy “I want to be there when he wakes up.”
“Trust me, Dove, knowing Prongs, he might just sleep in till tomorrow,” Sirius added “Besides, you won’t miss a thing. He’ll still be the same obnoxious Potter tomorrow morning.”
A small curl of smile tugs on her lips.
“Come on, I’ll walk you back to your dorm.” Peter offers this time.
“You don’t have to, Wormy. I’m fine—”
“Dove, please,” Sirius begs “You look awful. And I mean this in the most endearing way but you could really use a bath.”
“Thank you, Pads,” She rolls her eyes, finally standing from her seat and glaring at the raven haired boy “Your honesty is always something I could count on, even in the darkest time.”
Sirius grins, nodding, “I am a man of honour.”
“Let me know if anything happens? If he wakes up?”
“We will,” Remus reassures “Goodnight, Love.”
With a last bid of hug and ignoring the still awful churning feeling in her gut, she links arm with Peter and walks out of the hospital wing. It’s been hours since she’s waited for her boyfriend to wake up from his sleep and the fatigue plaguing her body has only been recognised as she takes further steps away from the infirmary. Perhaps the worry has amplified the soreness of her muscles. It’s never an easy life dating the Captain of Gryffindor team.
She hates to admit it, but she might really need that bath Sirius was talking about.
And just when they were about to exit the tower, her brain reminded her of her left satchel, “Shoot, I forgot something.” She groans, letting out a frustrated sigh “Give me ten minutes?”
“Is it that important?” Peter asks “We can just bring it to you later.”
“I’ll be quick, I promise. I have to finish my paper for the first period tomorrow, I need to get my satchel.”
Peter only nods at her as she begins running back to the ward. Truth be told, she’s finished the paper as she waited for James earlier. Leaving her satchel was completely by accident and she could’ve just continued walking back to her dormitory and ask the boys to bring it to her later, but why would she pass up a chance to see her boyfriend one last time?
“So did she come?”
A smile blooms on her face as she hears James’ voice echoes faintly. He’s up.
“Of course she did, she waited for you for hours.” Sirius answers “She’s your girlfriend, Prongs, she never left.”
“Oh,” James answered, the disappointment dripping from his tone slows down her steps “I was asking about Lily, actually.”
There was a pause. She could see Sirius and Remus exchanging a glance from behind their backs. If it wasn’t for the curtain blocking James’ view, he would’ve seen her coming.
“So did she come?” James asks again.
“No, Prongs. Why would she come?” Remus asks, his tone slightly rising in annoyance.
“I don’t know,” James answers “I thought we were getting closer. I just figured she’d want to check on me.”
“Well, she didn’t,” Sirius says this time, the same level of irritation evident in his tone “Why are you even thinking of her? You have a brilliant girlfriend who cares for you. Who literally spent hours sitting on that awful chair, worried about your bonked head, and the first thing you asked about when you woke up was Lily?”
“It was just a question, Pads. No need to get all worked up on me.”
“Well, your question is rubbish, Prongs.”
“Why are you—”
“Hey guys,” She says, finally showing herself from behind the curtain “Sorry, I left my satchel. Oh, hello James, you finally woke up.”
She could see the surprise on James’ eyes that he quickly blinked away with a sweet smile, “Hello, Darling.”
“I’m glad you’re up. Are you feeling okay?”
“Still dizzy, but I’ll live.” He says warmly “Will you stay with me tonight?”
“Uh, no, I need to finish my papers.” She says instead, fighting the loud ringing in her ears from the heartache “Besides, you need all the rest you could get. I wouldn’t want to bother you.”
“But you wouldn’t—”
“I really need to go. Peter is waiting for me,” She cuts in “Good night, James.”
She glances at Remus and Sirius for a brief moment. Staring at them for too long would make all the dam she’s trying to uphold break lose and the last thing she’d want to do tonight would be to cry in front of James. No, she would not give him that satisfaction. It is one thing to deny and avoid all of her questions and another to actually dismiss her presence. Perhaps it's time for her to accept that the heart James wears on his sleeve was never hers to begin with.
As she walks out of the infirmary for the second time tonight, she could hear Sirius’ curse faintly, “You’ve lost her for good now, Prongs.”
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ebsmind · 11 months ago
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𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 ❀ tom blyth x fem!singer reader
summary : readers reputation isn’t all that good but who cares since she’s met the love of her life
warning(s) : reader gets slut shamed :( but that’s it
a/n : i’m going to be real honest i wanted to use hailee steinfeld as the fc BUT i just had to do olivia bc she’s so me and i listened to delicate by taylor swift about 10 times while i made this 🙃
i also had a really hard time coming up with why the readers reputation is 👎🏼 so i kinda just went with the whole olivia and sabrina thing but it’s reversed!! 😼 (so instead of olivia getting broken up with it’s sabrina who got broken up with)
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ynuser happiness 🙃
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user1 oh so ur happy bc ur a home wrecker?
user2 yikes…
user3 Y/N PLS I CANNOT KEEP DEFENDING YOU GIRL
user4 y’all don’t even know the full story pls
user5 she’s such a slut
*comments have been disabled
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ynuserupdates the tea is popping hot between these three! y/n rodrigo has now claimed that she has never had any romantic relationship with joshua basset…will sabrina carpenter clear the air between the situation??
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user1 she SPOKE on the situation??
↳ user2 yeah she went on a podcast
user3 oh shit
user4 this is why yall shouldn’t believe everything on the internet 😭
user5 poor y/n and sabrina :(
↳ user6 all over a guy too :(
user7 guys will always be the problem
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ynuser i’m soooo excited to announce that i wrote a song called Can’t Catch Me Now for the new Hunger Games : The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes movie!!! 🕊️🐍🧡
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rachelzegler THATS MY GIRL!!!
user1 sis really said lemme just make the greatest comeback of all time
user2 oh she’s slaying ur honor
hunterschafer the best person who could’ve written a song for this movie
tomblyth so proud of you
user3 TOMS COMMENT OMG???
user4 i just KNOW this song is gonna be so good
user5 girl was probably finishing up writing this song when the whole sabrina and josh thing was going on 😭😭
thehungergames 🧡🧡🧡
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ynuser life recently 🖤
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user1 Y/N WHOS THE BOY
rachelzegler SOFT LAUNCH I REPEAT SOFT LAUNCH
tomblyth cutie
❤️ by creator
↳ user2 SHUT UP OMG
user3 TOM AND Y/N????
user4 SOFT LAUNCH MY ASSSSS RACHEL
user5 pls wasn’t she just with that josh guy?
↳ user6 girl she went on a podcast and said it was a fake rumor
user7 oh this next album is gonna HIT
❤️ by creator
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tomblyth premier day
tagged : @/ynuser , @/rachelzegler , @/hunterschafer , @/thehungergames
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ynuser hey that’s me!!!
ynuser took the last pic on tom’s phone
❤️ by creator
rachelzegler oh we ate that
user1 y’all SLAYEDDDD
user2 stream can’t catch me now yall ✌️
❤️ by creator
user3 y/n taking a .5 on tom’s phone is so cute
↳ user4 no literally they are my PARENTSSSS
user5 the girls are slaying ur honor
hunterschafer love you!!
tomblyth added to their story!
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ynuser delicate mv out now!!
tagged : @/tomblyth
tomblyth i’m in love with you
↳ ynuser i love you more
user1 OH MY GODODJNSND
user2 AN ALBUM IS COMING
user3 BRO TOM BEING IN THE MUSIC VIDEO I CANT???
user4 NOW THIS WAS A HARD LAUNCH
rachelzegler omg the cats finally out of the bag I CAN TALK ABOUT THEM NOW
↳ ynuser PLSSSS sis was eager and almost spilled the beans like a week ago 😭
↳ rachelzegler i just LOVE YALL SO MUCH
hunterschafer such a perfect song for a perfect couple 🖤
user5 i cannot do this today
user6 joshua basset is def crying in the corner
↳ user7 NAH FR HE FUMBLED HER AND SABRINA
conangray ate
user8 y/n be so fr we been knew since the announcement of can’t catch me now
❤️ by creator
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mayghosts · 5 months ago
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OBSESSED: (Kate Martin x Reader)
Summary: You and Caitlin ended your relationship as good friends. However, one of Caits new teammates seems a bit too interested in your last relationship.
Warnings: used Y/N 🫤, alcohol, obsessive crushes
AN: I almost didn't post this but... we will see how long i leave it up for b4 i redo it
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Kate always considered herself to be a perfect friend, but lately something has been hanging over head.
From the first time Caitlin had introduced you to the team. Kate knew she was cooked. Her stomache flipping and her face heating up as you smiled and introduced yourself. Cooked. You got along so well with the team, and watching you talk about your hobbies and interests only made Kates butterflies increase tenfold. That night Kate took it upon herself to find your Instagram, as well as your moms Instagram… and most of your extended family.
And if you knew how much I looked at her pictures you would think we’re bestfriends
Two months later Kate felt like she was in some sort of “What Would You Do?” show, listening to Caitlin explain how you two had ended things on good terms. On one side she was sad for her friend. On the other hand she had just swiped off your Tik Tok profile and was just a bit too excited that you were single.
And I know you loved her and I know I’m butthurt But I can’t help it, no, I can’t help it, Im so obsessed with you ex.
Seeing you in the crowd at the next Iowa game was slightly unexpected. You and Caitlin had been broken up for almost two weeks now, maybe you were on better terms than Kate had thought? She pryed her eyes away from you in the stands, attempting to re-focus on the game. Every basket she made that night, she felt her eyes drift up to where you were sitting. Were you watching? Did you see that? Even though Kate had been a top scorer that game, she secretly accredited that Iowa win to you.
I'm starin’ at her like I wanna get hurt, and I remember every single detail you have told me so be careful baby
It was driving Kate crazy, having a crush and not being able to tell her friends. You were driving her crazy. She was at the point that she knew far too much about you, and she probably wouldn’t be able to have a normal conversation with you. In her mind there was no better solution to this than getting drunk and starting a life altering situationship.
However upon entering the bar, she was met with your smiling face. Kate felt herself loosing her sanity as she watched you dance with your friends under the colored lights. She had no idea how long she sat at that bar, just keeping an eye on you. Long enough to get absolutely hammered. She was absolutely obsessed with you.
She's got those hips she's got those lips, the life of every fucking party
The next morning Kates hangover anxiety quickly turned to hangover guilt as she noticed she spent all of late night thirsting over her best friends ex- girlfriend. Not being able to take it anymore she slid off her bed, making her way to Gabbies room.
Gently knocking she pushed the door open, “Gabbie, I need your help. I think I’m fucked.” Looking up from her book Gabbie responded ���Kate whats wrong? How drunk did you get last night!?” “No this isn’t drunk me being dumb its sober me, I am going to tell you this but please don’t freak out I know its so bad.” Gabbie stared silently at Kate, “I have the worst crush on y/n… you know.. Caitlins ex?” Silence fell over the room. “Jesus Christ Kate you made it sound like you killed someone…. I mean that's not terrible, like they're on good terms and all that. Y/N is so sweet, and incredibly talented. I know she has said good stuff about you in the past, she thinks your cute.”
“She's talented, she's good with kids, she even speaks kindly about me”
“Hey Cait can we talk?” Kate felt like incinerating herself. Her hands were sweaty as she fiddled with the end of her pony tail. The locker room was empty aside from the two of them and Kate knew it was now or never. Caitlon glanced over, taling in Kates anxious appearance "yea whats up?" Taking a deep breath Kate started, "So... I have a crush, but its someone we both know. It's really shitty of me, but I need to tell you."
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abruuu01 · 9 months ago
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Obsessed
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Chris sturniolo x fem!reader
Summary: based on obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo, you have a relationship with Chris but you feel insecure about his ex
Warnings: insecurities, fluff
Author’s note: I finally got the courage to upload something, this is gonna be my first post so please be nice and also tell me what would you like to see like tropes and ideas! 🫶🏻
Also English isn’t my first language so please let me know if i spelled something wrong!
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If I told you about how much I think about her you’d think I’m in love..
I might think about Chris’s ex a little.. too much. But what can you expect? She is almost my opposite, she was blond with blue eyes, perfect hips.. perfect lips, always the life of the party . Everything that made me easily insecure, but Chris loved me.. I knew it.. but, how could he love me.. after her?..
Every time he called me pretty.. or praise words I thought “what if he mistakedme for her?” Cause god, she really it’s beautiful.
I know they both moved on but.. I don’t know I can’t help it.
Now I was laying in his bed on my side, Chris was in the shower and I can’t help but think about how she’s been asleep on the same place I’m in right now, god it makes me so upset, I didn’t even realize I was frowning my brows until I heard Chris’s voice, I haven’t realized he finished showering too.
“What happened baby? Why are you frowning your brows like that?” - he asked, turning around to take some clothes on his closet, when I looked up at him I saw that he was in just his boxers, his hair dripping from the recent shower.
“What?.. oh nothing I was just.. thinking..” - I replied trying to avoid it.
He finished changing putting on his plaid pajama pants and a white tank top. He sat in front of me taking my hands and caressing them with his thumb, then he looked at me in the eyes.
“If something’s wrong you can tell me, you know that right?” - he placed his free hand on my cheek caressing it making me smile softly, I nodded.
“Of course love.. well.. there’s something that’s been on my mind lately..” - I sighed insecure about if I should tell him or not.. but I did i told him everything and he sat there hearing everything I had to say, the way I felt about his ex and what made me insecure.
Once I finished talking I sighed wanting to cry since I didn’t heard him speak.. “what if he thought it was stupid?.. I shouldn’t had said anything” I thought
“Oh.. why didn’t you tell me you felt this way princess?”- he said breaking the silence as he caressed my cheek and then pulled me in for a hug, I placed my head on the crook of him neck, smelling his scent.
“I was scared that you would think it was a stupid thing or.. I don’t know..”- I hugged him tight.
“Hey listen to me beautiful,”- he grabbed my shoulders looking at me in the eyes with his soft blue gaze. “Nothing that you ever said would be stupid to me.. please don’t be scared to tell me if something bothers you okay? I love you”
I nodded, smiling as I pulled him into a hug again.
“I love you more, baby”
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188 notes · View notes
riordanness · 5 months ago
Text
okay so every single (okay some) pjo character and their opinion on taylor swift bc that’s all i think about:
percy jackson: isn’t the biggest swiftie in the world but adores her music if it’s on. he owns at least two copies of the 1989 cd and his fav song to blast while skateboarding is welcome to new york ofc.
annabeth chase: absolutely loves taylor, probably really resonated with her lyrics and storytelling style tbh. her favourite albums are definitely 1989 (the beach-y california vibe yk), lover, and midnights and folklore and evermore and fearless and reputation and speak now. (what can i say—she’s a swiftie)
grover underwood: he’s a music guy. ofc he likes taylor swift. probably only knows like four songs total, and they’re all from like debut and fearless but hey. that’s something.
piper mclean: you can’t tell me she doesn’t ADORE reputation. and probably fearless too actually. definitely has some kind of merch (a signed cd??) in her room back home.
hazel levesque: obviously didn’t know anything about her but once introduced, loves folklore and evermore and the tortured poets department. soft and soothing songs are defo her thing.
leo valdez: old mate probably listens to all too well every day tbh. he doesn’t love her and definitely isn’t a swiftie, but red (especially the vault tracks and the songs written for hunger games) are always welcome.
jason grace: my boy knows nothing. nothing. but you bet he finds out about her eventually and doesn’t really have an opinion either way. he neither hates or loves or dislikes or likes. it’s just music to him.
frank zhang: probably likes debut. but probably also never really thought about her or knew much about her music bc of his grandmother and stuff yk.
nico di angelo: to anyone’s face: absolutely not. but secretly? oh yeah. he would totally listen to folklore and shit are you kidding me?? he’s such a swiftie.
reyna avila ramirez-arellano: yes and no. a couple songs in her playlist but not like. that much. she doesn’t really mind her and doesn’t really love her either.
luke castellan: he’s lowkey a hater. probably listens to kanye just to spite swifties and writes those hate comments on all her fanpages and shit yk.
thalia grace: she likes about half of the reputation songs and a couple of ttpd too. (especially look what you made me do). but she’s more into older music like green day (iykyk hehe)
silena beauregard: UH. YES. lover girl in the flesh. she is totally the camp’s biggest swiftie and is the one who got annabeth into her. she’d defo have merch and posters and have memorised everything.
clarisse la rue: silena made her do it. that’s what she’d tell you,and it’s true!! but she has a secret soft spot for a good taylor swift song.
chris rodriguez: knows about her through clarisse, doesn’t really give a damn about her.
charles beckendorf: BIGGEST SWIFTIE EVER headcanon okok. owns merch. posters. go to her tours. the whole shibing shabong iykyk
apollo/lester papadopoulos: duh. he’s the god of music bro. i think he would appreciate the literal music industry herself
meg mccaffery: no way. she’s a professional hater for the pure fun of it, has probably never heard a single song other than shake it off, and comments ‘kanye better’ on all her fan accounts
carter kane: tbh he would appreciate her lyricism a lot, but doesn’t strike me as someone who listens to that much music in general?? also he wouldn’t really know a lot of normal pop culture stuff necessarily, so…
sadie kane: she likes her. she likes everything. she’s a pop girlie fs, so reputation/midnights are her BANGER albums. she would definitely have some taylor swift on her ipod playlist, but she’d be more into avril lavigne, lady gaga, olivia rodrigo and stuff like that.
zia rashid: who’s taylor swift?
magnus chase: the only canon swiftie magnus you have my heart. he’s also a basic white girl, thank you very much. he literally (IN CANON BTW) recognises ‘blank space’ and ‘i know places’ and identifies them as taylor swift. so. yeah. he’s a swiftie fs
coach hedge: lol nope. he’d have the worst music taste of all time. NEVER give him the aux
sally jackson: she would LOVEEE evermore and speak now and debut, fight me. she’s also just the perfect person ever so ofc she loves taylor swift
paul blofis: would defo vibe to it imo, but would never put any songs in his playlist tho cause he’s boring ok maybe he would for sally’s sake. and estelle’s
65 notes · View notes
morgana-larkin · 6 months ago
Note
First off I LOVEEEE YOUR WRITING
Second off I have an angst request! I don’t know the specifics but it can be based off of one step forward and two steps back by Olivia Rodrigo!! And like Mel is not appreciative of the reader until the reader leaves her to focus on her mental!!
Thank you for loving my writing! ❤️ So I’ll be honest and I got a writer’s block while writing this. I got inspiration randomly but it came and went. I did listen to the song a bit on repeat along with her songs ‘good 4 u’ and ‘get him back’ , hope it’s not terrible. Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!
On another note: I’m almost done the next chapter of ‘Worth It’. I am busy over the weekend so I won’t get a lot of writing done but I’ll try and get at least the next chapter out.
Doubt
Warnings: bit of toxic Mel at the beginning, angst, fluff, dancing
Words: 5k
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You called Melissa on the phone, knowing she should be home by now from work. She picks up the phone on the second ring.
“Hey y/n.”
“Hi Melissa, how was work?”
“It was fine.” Is all she said, she never bothers to ask it back but you always tell her anyway.
“Alright, I had a pretty ok day.”
“Did you call to rub it in my face that you had a better day?” She says and you don’t know where that came from but you don’t point it out.
“No, just called to talk to you. Want me to come over to help cheer you up?”
“Sure.” Melissa says and you hang up after telling her that you’re on your way.
You arrive and knock on the door. Melissa answers it and lets you in right away. She pushes you up against the door and makes out with you for a few minutes. After she strips you both of your clothing when you reach her bed. She pounds all her frustration into you with the dildo you. You come 3 times before she comes herself.
“Feel better?” You ask her and she nods.
“Ya, thanks.” She tells you.
“Of course.” You tell her.
After a couple hours, you go home. You sometimes feel a bit like Melissa treats you like a casual sex partner. You love her and you’ve told her a few times but she’s never said it back before. You two have been going out for about 4 months now, and you were happy at first but now it’s starting to weigh you down. This time you don’t tell her you love her before you get in the car, you just get in your car and drive away.
You send her a good morning text like you do every morning but you don’t receive anything back. It’s always a gamble if you receive a text back or not.
You go to see her that afternoon after you’re both done work but this time she doesn’t let you in.
“What are you doing here?” She asks you.
“I wanted to see you so I came over to see you.” You tell her.
“I didn’t tell you that you could.” She tells you and your face drops.
“Oh, sorry to bother you.” You tell her and you turn around and leave. She shuts the door before you get to your car. You send her a good morning text every morning this week but she doesn’t reply. You send her one on Saturday morning and you tell yourself if she doesn’t reply then you’ll leave her. She isn’t acting like a loving partner, she hasn’t even said it back, maybe it’s because she doesn’t love you. Maybe she does see you as more of a casual sex partner.
She doesn’t reply to your text so you go to see her that night. You pull up to her driveway and knock on the door. She answers and she’s wondering why you’re there.
“Y/n why are you here again?” She says to you.
“I’ll be quick.” You tell her and she looks confused. “Melissa, I don’t know what kind of thing this is between us but it’s not what I thought it would be.” You start and she still looks at you confused. “I thought it would be a loving relationship but it seems that you just see me as a casual sex partner. And that’s not what I want with you. So I’m ending it with you.” You tell her and she looks at you shocked. Before she says anything, you bolt out of there.
Melissa stands there shocked for a couple minutes. She then carefully closes her front door and leans against it and takes a deep breath.
*rewind to the phone call. Melissa’s side*
She sees you calling and takes a deep breath, she’s had a shit day and doesn’t want to get angry at you. She still picks up though.
“Hey y/n.” She says, trying to remain casual.
“Hi Melissa, how was work?” You tell her a bit cheerfully.
“It was fine.” She doesn’t ask you about yours. She wants to distance herself from you. She’s developing big feelings for you and she doesn’t know what to do with it. You’re so young and beautiful, she doesn’t know why you’re still with her.
“Alright, I had a pretty ok day.” You tell her and a bit of anger escapes her.
“Did you call to rub it in my face that you had a better day than me?” She asks you and then mentally facepalms.
“No, just called to talk to you.” You tell her and she thinks you’re too good for her. “Want me to come over to help cheer you up?” You offer her and she knows she should say no.
“Sure.” She lets slip out and she facepalms, she’s supposed to be distancing herself, not letting you come over. You happily tell her you’re on your way and then hang up.
When you come over she pushes you against the door. She missed you and to throw her shit day into the mix, she has your clothes off quickly. It isn’t much longer until she’s pounding the dildo into you, letting her anger, frustration and love into it. You go home after a little bit and she watches you walk away and she looks down. She slowly closes the door and leans against it. She hears you turn your car on and pull away. She lets out a deep breath and a tear slips down her cheek.
She gets a good morning text from you the next morning and she groans. She gets one from you every morning and it’s so sweet and she curses at herself every morning. Why did the universe have to send her someone so young that she definitely doesn’t deserve. She doesn’t reply to you, and it hurts her every time. She knows she should break up with you instead of treating you like this, but she doesn’t have the heart to let you go.
You came over to see her the following day and she sends you away, she’s still mad at herself for letting you over yesterday. She doesn’t want to mess with your head but she can’t help it sometimes. She’s only human and she misses you and in those vulnerable times, it slips through.
She gets a text from you the rest of the week, even on Saturday.
She knows on Saturday that she should be planning dates with you like you guys used to do but she doesn’t. She spends the day by herself and thinking about you throughout most of the day. That night she hears a knock on her door and she goes to answer it. She didn’t expect to see you there when she answers it. Inside, she’s excited to see you again. On the outside, she’s neutral about it.
“Y/n why are you here again?” She tells you and it breaks her a bit to say that.
“I’ll be quick.” You tell her and she’s confused but lets you continue. “Melissa, I don’t know what kind of thing this is between us but it’s not what I thought it would be.” You continue and she has a feeling she knows where this is going and lets you continue. “I thought it would be a loving relationship but it seems that you just see me as a casual sex partner. And that’s not what I want with you. So I’m ending it with you.” You tell her and even if she was expecting this, it still hurts her and she’s shocked.
A million things run through her mind, what should she say? Should she try and make it up to you and get you back? Should she let you go? Before she makes up her mind, you bolt out of there and drive away. She stands there looking at where you were just standing and she’s defeated. She then carefully closes her front door and leans against it and takes a deep breath. She slides down the door to the ground. She turns to her side against it and leans her head against the door “I love you too y/n.” She says to the air and cries.
The next day she’s curled on the couch and stares at her phone, debating if she should text or call you or to let you live your life without her. After all, isn’t this what she wanted? For you to leave her so you can live your life? It is what she wanted, she reminds herself, it still hurts though.
You got home after ending it with Melissa and cry when you get home. You had to do it, she was messing with your head and you have to protect your mental health. The next day you spend all day thinking about her. The first 2 months was great, then you told her you love her and that’s when things started to change. When she started to change.
You did nothing on Sunday, then you went to work on Monday. You walked in the building and went to your desk. A couple hours later you hear a knock on your door and you look up. You see Janine there with a smile.
“What’s up Janine?” You ask her.
“Well I wanted to run something by you before I go to the meeting and bring it up with everyone else.” She tells you and you let her sit and go through it with you.
You and Janine became quick friends at the district. You went with Janine to go to Abbott quite a few times and that’s how you met Melissa. No one knew about your relationship with her. Melissa preferred to keep it a secret and you went along with it cause most relationships with people are a secret at first until it becomes official. But then Melissa wanted to keep it secret and you knew she preferred to keep her personal life private.
Janine runs by what she wanted to bring up to everyone else. You gave her a couple tips about it and told her that it’s great.
On Monday the next week, Janine knocks on your door again.
“Hey Janine.”
“Hey y/n, so they want us to go to Abbott and keep an eye on the librarian program for a few days.” She tells you and you pale. Abbott. Where Melissa is.
“Starting when?” You ask her.
“Um like right now.” She tells you and you sigh.
“Ok let me finish this up, and we can go. It shouldn’t take me more than 15 minutes.” You tell her and she nods and goes.
The two of you arrive at Abbott 45 minutes later. You walk in through the front door and a few memories come back. They used to be happy memories but now they just bring you down.
You check in at the front desk and you make it to the library for the meeting during lunch to introduce the librarian. You walk in with Janine and all eyes go on the both of you. Janine takes centre stage and you see everyone look at her. You take notes about what’s talked about and you can’t help but feel a pair of eyes on you the entire time. You look up and don’t see anyone staring at you but that feeling doesn’t go away the whole time. You see Melissa there next to Barb but she seems neutral like always.
“Y/n and I will oversee the librarian program for the entire week. If you have any questions, complaints or concerns about it then come to one of us.” Janine says then all the teachers are dismissed.
*Melissa*
Melissa was sitting in the library next to Barb, waiting for the meeting to start. She sees Janine walk in and then she sees you and she freezes. She didn’t expect to see you so soon but the district usually sent you with Janine to oversee changes at Abbott.
She tries to look away to focus on what Janine was saying the entire time but all she can focus on is you. She sees you go to look up and she focuses her attention on Janine before you can see her staring at you. She keeps doing that until Janine finishes.
“Y/n and I will oversee the librarian program for the entire week. If you have any questions, complaints or concerns about it then come to one of us.” Janine finishes and her breath hitches, you’ll be here for the entire week?
Melissa got pulled out of her inner crisis by her best friend calling her name. “Melissa, Melissa?” Barb said and Melissa looked at her.
“What?”
“Well y/n is here, don’t you want to go say hi your friend?” Barb said and Melissa shook her head.
“No, she’s busy overseeing the librarian program.”
“Well I’m sure she can take 10 seconds to say hello to you.”
“Just drop it Barb.” Melissa told her as she grabbed her purse and walked out. Barb could tell something has been off with Melissa for a week, she’s been in a sour mood. Barb is still happy to see you so she decided to go say hi to you by herself.
“Hi y/n.” Barb told you and you looked up from your notes.
“Hi Barb, how have you been?” You asked her.
“Oh I’m good. Can’t say the same for Melissa though.” She said and you raised an eyebrow in question. “She’s been in a sour mood for a week.” She told you. “She would have said hi to you if she wasn’t in a mood.” She told you.
“Oh well that’s alright, I wonder what happened.” You told her.
“I’m not sure. She won’t tell me.” Barb said and then she got an idea. She saw how Melissa looks at you and she might tell you. “Maybe you could ask her if you get a minute.” Barb said and you looked at her confused.
“If she doesn’t want to tell you then I highly doubt she’ll tell me.” You state. “I mean she tells you everything.”
“She tells me mostly everything. There’s still some things she keeps to herself. But how have you been dear?”
“Been better, I was seeing someone but I ended it recently.” You told her.
“Oh I’m sorry sweetheart. Since you’ll be here all week then maybe you can sit with Melissa and I at lunch again.” She tells you and you bite your lip.
“I don’t know how busy I’ll be but I’ll keep that in mind, thank you.” You tell her and she nods her head and leaves the library.
Oh y/n.” Janine says and comes up to you. “Would you mind handing these reviews out to the the teachers on the first floor and I’ll do the second floor.” She says and hands you a stack of papers. “And feel free to talk to any teachers, we don’t have much else to do the rest of the day.” She adds and leaves the library. As soon as she leaves it hits you, Melissa is a teacher on the first floor. You leave the library and get started, you decide to just get it over with, with Melissa.
You walk to her classroom and knock on the door. “Come in.” You hear her say, you take a deep breath, open the door and walk in. Melissa looks up at who entered and did a double take.
“I came to drop this off, I’m tasked to hand it out to all the first floor teachers.” You tell her and hand a piece of paper to her. “Just fill it out and hand it back to me or Janine at the end of the week.” You say and turn to leave.
“Wait.” She says and you turn back around. “How-how have you been?” She asks and you’re taken back.
“You should have asked that when we were together.” You tell her and she looks down.
“There’s a lot of things I should have done.” She mutters but you hear her.
“There’s something I don’t understand though.” You tell her and she looks up at you. “It was fine in the beginning, but then the last 2 months, something changed. What happened?” You asked her.
“Nothing really happened, just stopped working.” She says to you and you push.
“I know when you’re lying.” You tell her. “What happened?” You asked again and she went back to the papers on her desk. “Was I not pretty enough?” You ask and she snaps her head at you.
“That’s not it at all.” She tells you.
“Was I not enough for you?” You ask her.
“That's not it either.”
“Then please tell me. I’ve gone through all of the possible reasons in my head and I can’t figure it out.” You plead and she looks absolutely defeated.
“I can’t tell you.” She says and you sigh.
“Why not?”
“Because I can’t.” She says and you go to say something but she cuts you off. “Thank you for the paper, I’ll fill it out by the end of the week.” She tells you and you sigh.
“Fine then. Don’t know why I expected an answer. Never got any when we were together.” You tell her and she snaps her head at you again. You go to walk out but then turn around with another question. “Can you at least answer me this. Did you even love me?” You ask her and her eyes widen.
“Why do you want to know?” She asks.
“Because I want to know. You never said it back but I want to know if you did.” You tell her and she regrets the next words out of her mouth.
“You have your answer. There’s a reason I never said it back.” She tells you and sees the hurt on your face. She really wants to comfort you but knows she can’t.
“You should have just broken up with me, instead of just dragging me along and using me.” You tell her and turn around and walk out. You close the door and take a deep breath and continue your work. Unknown to you, Barb heard most of that conversation as she was walking along and hid in the classroom next door and Melissa’s door was open. You continue handing out the papers to the teachers and Barb goes to see Melissa.
“You and y/n went out?” Barb asks Melissa as soon as she enters her classroom without even knocking.
“What?” Melissa asks with a sniffle.
“You and y/n dated. But it ended a week ago, didn’t it?” Barb asks and Melissa nods. “What happened?”
Melissa goes on to tell her everything that happened, holding nothing back.
“Oh Melissa, you should have not let those doubts and thoughts take over. She made you happy.” Barb says and Melissa sighs.
“She did ya. I didn’t have the heart to break up with her so I pushed her to break up with me.” Melissa says. “I miss her so much.” Melissa says and begins to cry and Barb comforts her friend.
The next day you walk in and you went to go ask Gregory a question but before you knock, you overhear a conversation between Melissa and Barb in Melissa’s classroom, the door slightly open.
Curiosity getting the best of you, you walk over to hear their conversation better.
“Melissa, you should tell her the real reason the relationship ended.” Barb says to her.
“Why would I do that?”
“Because then you two would actually talk, and besides, y/n deserves to know the truth.” Barb says and your eyes widen.
“How would I tell her what really happened? Cause I don’t know the whole part myself.” Melissa says with a sigh.
“Melissa, you know the whole reason, stop blaming yourself for being human. You had a lot of doubts about being in the relationship because of the age difference, that’s alright to have. But you should have talked to her about that instead of pushing her to break up with you.” Barb tries to talk sense into her friend.
“She deserves to have a life. One that she won’t get by being with me.”
“And who gets to decide that? Cause I think y/n should decide that for herself.”
“I’m not going to talk to her Barb! I love her too much to let her get stuck in a relationship with someone like me!” Melissa says and you gasp silently so they won’t hear you and then tip toe over to Gregory’s classroom. You count to 10 seconds so they wouldn’t think that you heard everything and knock. Gregory opens the door a couple seconds later.
“Oh hey y/n, what’s up?” He asks you.
“I had a couple questions for you actually, do you mind if I take a couple minutes of your time?” You ask.
“Oh not at all, do you want to come in? I was just writing something on the board before they get here.” He says and you hear Barb exit Melissa’s classroom.
“Oh sure, that’s not a problem.” You tell him and enter the classroom.
*rewind to a couple minutes ago*
“I’m not going to talk to her Barb! I love her too much to let her get stuck in a relationship with someone like me!” Melissa tells and Barb sighs.
Barb speaks the next part quietly. “Melissa, there’s nothing wrong about being in a relationship with you. I’ve been your best friend for many years and you’re an amazing person who constantly puts yourself down for no reason.” Barb tells her and before Melissa can say anything else, you both hear a knock down the hall Gregory speaking.
“Oh hey y/n.” He says.
“Do you think she heard us?” Melissa asks, eyes wide.
“No, I don’t think so. She might have just been coming down the hall and I spoke too quietly for her to hear.” Barb says. “Think about what I said.” Barb says and Melissa nods. Barb then leaves the classroom and Melissa hears your voice.
“Oh sure, that’s not a problem.” Melissa sighs, she really misses you.
You spend the day analysing Melissa’s behaviour when you’re around, and what you overheard might be true. Melissa does seem to keep glancing at you as much as possible, and you see it in the corner of your eye so she doesn’t think she’s getting caught. It’s not as much as she’s looking at you but how she’s looking at you. She has sadness and guilt on her face and it looks like she wants to talk to you but keeps stopping herself.
You decide to go see her at home after school today. You pull up her driveway and go and knock on the door. She opens it about 5 seconds later and she’s stunned to see you there.
“Y/n?” She says in disbelief.
“Can I come in?”
“W-why?”
“Because we need to talk.” You tell her sternly and she steps aside to let you in. You walk in and go sit on her couch. Melissa closes the door slowly, takes a breath, turns towards you and walks over.
“What did you want to talk about?” She asks and you look at her.
“I heard everything you and Barb said this morning in your classroom.” You tell her and she gasps.
“You what?” She asks in shock.
“Why didn’t you tell me what was really going on inside your head?” You ask her and she sighs, then comes to sit on the couch.
“Because y/n, you’re so young and you might not understand it to the full extent.” Melissa says.
“You don’t think I haven’t had similar thoughts, only in reverse?” You say and she looks confused. “I’ve had doubts too, about the age gap, I thought that maybe I was too young for you. I thought you would think I’m too immature or something.” You tell her.
“You being immature never crossed my mind.” She tells you and you look into her eyes and see how genuine she’s being.
“Barb‘s right, it’s up to me to decide what I want in my life. I may be young but I’m old enough to know what I want.” You tell her and she tilts her head at you.
“And what do you want?”
“You, you idiota!” You tell her and she looks taken aback.
“Did you just call me an idiot in Italian?” She asks.
“Yes I did.” You say proudly and she smiles.
“I definitely deserve that.” She says to you. “I don’t know how I’d ever make you forgive me and make it up to you.” She tells you and you go and connect your phone to the speaker in her living room. Melissa is watching you the whole time. You walk back up to her and hold out a hand for her to talk and she looks at you confused.
“You said you don’t know how to make it up to me, start by dancing with me.” You tell her and she holds your hand. You yank at it and she gets up and follows you to the open area. The song starts off slow and you’re humming along to it while you and Melissa slow dances and you can tell she doesn’t know it. Once the chorus goes you sing and spin her in surprise. “Don’t blame me, love made me crazy! If it doesn’t, you ain’t doing it right! Lord save me, my drug is my baby, I’ll be using for the rest of my life!” You sing and Melissa is amused with this song. The next one starts and this one she knows and she starts singing it.
“Baby, when I met you there was peace unknown.” She starts and she twirls you around. “You do something to me that I can't explain.”
Then you sing. “Hold me closer and I feel no pain.” You both sing it.
“Making love to each other ah ah. Islands in the stream, this is what we are!” She twirls you back into her and your back is pushed into her front and you look at each other.
“Sail away with me.” She sings to you and you both continue to dance to it.
The next song is more upbeat and Melissa knows she’s heard it before but can’t place it. You start dancing to the beat with her and she just goes along with it.
“And I’m singing a song, hoping he’ll be back when he hears it.” You sing and let go of her hands. “My heart goes sha-la-la-la” you sing and clap 3 times to the beat and you do it again while also singing and she laughs. She then goes to your Spotify and plays a song that hopefully explains how she feels. She presses on it and it starts playing and she sings it. You instantly recognize the song but you pay attention to her singing it.
“Remember those walls I built? Well baby, they’re tumbling down, and they didn’t even put up a fight, they didn’t even make a sound. I found a way to let you in but I never really had a doubt. Standing in the light of your halo, I got my angel now.” She sings and lifts you up and spins you. “It’s like I’ve been awakened , every rule I had you breakin’, it’s the risk that I’m takin’. “ she continues and puts you down and cups your cheek. “I ain’t never gonna shut you out.” She says and then spins you around. “I’m surrounded by your embrace. Baby, I can see your halo, you know you’re my saving grace. You’re everything I need and more.” And she locks your hands together and puts one on your hip and you put yours on her shoulder and then she spins you both around. “It’s written all over your face, baby I can feel your halo, pray it won’t fade away. I can feel your halo halo, I can see your halo halo, I can feel your halo halo, I can see your halo halo.” She sings and you can tell there’s more to it than just her singing the words.
You pull her to you and you connect your lips with hers, she kisses you back without hesitation. When you pull back, she tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear and then she cups your cheek. “I’m really sorry for everything y/n. I should have talked to you but I was too scared to and then I believed the doubts that my mind came up with. You’re too good for me.” She says and kisses your forehead. “It broke my heart to act like how I did to you. But I thought it was the best for you.” She told you and you press a finger to her lips before she continues.
“I’ll forgive you, but on one condition.” You tell her and she looks at you with a lot of hope.
“Name it, anything.” She says.
“If you want to get back together with me, then I don’t want to hide the relationship.” You tell her and she smiles and hugs you.
“Of course! I want to be with you again and we can tell everyone!” She says through tears and hugs you tight, a bit too tight.
“Melissa, I do need to breathe.” You say and she immediately lets you go.
“Sorry.” She says and you kiss her.
You both pull back and you start humming a song before singing the next line. “I don’t do boys, just do girls, just do girl with kissable ass.” You sing and she bursts out laughing.
“You’re such a dork.” She tells you.
“Ya but you love me.” You tell her and she hums.
“I do, I do love you.” She says with her hands wrapped around your waist.
“I love you too.” You tell her and she smiles.
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eternal-love · 8 months ago
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Austin and Me
“Layla”
“Wife to the ‘king’. Icon to the world. Destined for more.”
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Summary: At 18 years old, she fell in love with Austin, at 20 years old, she became his wife, by 22, she was his doll. In which Cynthia’s life changed drastically after falling head over heels with a man that promised her the moon and the stars. She takes us down the memory lane of what could’ve been— the perfect marriage.
Inspired by the book: Elvis and Me by Priscilla Presley.
I do not condemn any of the portrayals I decide to do about certain people, it’s just fanfiction. And it would be divided in parts.
English isn’t my first language so I’m trying my best!
MASTERLIST
When I surprised him with my new look, he was taken aback at first then a huge smile appeared on his face, even his eyes glimmered.
“Look at ya! You look like a little doll.” Austin said to me as one of fingers played with a piece of my hair. “It makes your eyes stand out more.” He then grabbed my chin firmly. “I like you brunette and with less makeup. This is what I like.”
Bullshit. All he said was bullshit. If he liked me so much when I looked like this then why did he go after Lily-Rose’s tail. Why did he take her out for dinner? Why did he make out with her afterwards? Was I ever going to be enough for him? Because he hadn’t touch me since we were in Australia. And whenever he did, it was loveless.
I confronted him about what happened with Lily, we were having breakfast and I had seen the photos ENews published of Austin and Lily making out after having dinner together.
“Baby, it ain’t nothing, it’s just publicity.” He tried to defend himself, I only glared at him.
“Don’t call me baby.” I spat out harshly, I don’t know why but knowing that he probably called Lily ‘baby’ made me gag. As it had happened with Olivia.
“It’s PR an-” I interrupted him, standing up from the my chair.
“What’s going on?! Why doesn’t she go back to France where she belongs?” I yelled at him as I hit the table with my hands.
I couldn’t really read his face, he was in between being mad and taken aback. Of course he also stood up and grabbed my shoulder, tugging me a little.
“Listen to me. Cynthia. I need a woman who understands that things like this might happen. Are you gonna be her or not? He asked, looking down on me as if I were an spoiled child getting reprimanded.
“Okay.” Was all I said as I left the dining room.
—————————
After the incident happening, Austin started to be loving all over again, he had invited to have dinner with him and some castmates. I decided to accept after he begged me for days, I was still mad at him but I decided that maybe this could help us get closer.
I dressed up, monochrome clothing, black pants, cute pink top, I styled my hair and we were on our way to the restaurant. It was a sushi place, it had private karaoke and everything. I recognized some of them, Barry Keoghan and his girlfriend, Callum Turner, Anthony Boyle and others.
It was a nice dinner and food was delicious, although my mind was somewhere else, I was worried because I had left Lori back home with the nanny.
“Don’t worry too much, she’s being well taken care of.” Austin squeezed my hand. I simply hummed and nodded.
Feeling someone’s stare, I looked in front of me and there surely was Callum’s gaze lingering my face down my neck. His eyes went back to my face and he quickly snapped out of his trance, smiling at me and then looking at me. Weird, I thought, but it was the first time in months that a man ever looked at me like that. He didn’t talk to me much, but he surely did talk to the wives and girlfriends of his castmates. But he did look at me a lot, his foot touching mine from underneath the table.
Austin had always been charismatic but he was very, very shy so a karaoke was like social suicide to him. But Callum— he was another story. After a few sips of some Asian liquor, he was sure to go next on the karaoke.
“You should sing an Elvis song, Aus.” I whispered to Austin, trying to cheer him because it was truly getting boring.
“No, Cyn— I’ll just embarrass myself.” Austin denied it, he stayed at the booth and I rolled my eyes, I saw Barry’s girlfriend and a producer’s wife laughing with everyone as Barry and the producer sang ‘Heart of Glass’ without hitting a single note.
Laughing but at the same time feeling like I wasn’t enjoying this as I should, Callum made his way to me swiftly. Clearing his throat and sitting on the booth.
“Should I sing?” Callum spoke to me with his amazing voice and British accent, catching my attention.
“If you want to.” I shrugged my shoulders.
“I’ll sing one for ya. You’ll see, cause now— your man is as boring as a math class.” I chuckled and thought he was just joking. But then he got up and grabbed the mic, quickly searching for the song. As the instrumental started to play— I recognized that guitar riff everywhere. ‘Layla’.
As not everyone knows, the song was written by Eric Clapton, confessing his love to George Harrison’s wife, Pattie Boyd. I thought he must be just trying to lead me on, everyone cheered for Callum and his god-awful singing. Maybe it was to play it off but he started to jokingly point at whatever girl was taken. Everyone took it as a joke, even Austin. But towards me, he was a bit more serious.
‘I tried to give you consolation from when your old man let you down.’
‘Like a fool, I fell in love with you. You turned my whole world upside down.’
‘Layla, you’ve got me on my knees. I’m begging darling, please.’
He sang it directly to me, he tried to be playful and everything, but I knew he was serious. I just chuckled and tried to play it off. Was it so wrong that I wanted to tear his clothes off even if my husband was besides me? I could say the same things Austin said: ‘I’m a woman, I have needs, it’s in my dna.’
When the guys went to pay, I saw Callum grabbing his jacket, I got closer to him.
“What was that?” I asked, wanting an explanation.
“What, sweetheart?” He asked, acting oblivious, seeing my annoyed face, he chuckled. “It’s just a song, baby.”
“Don’t call me baby, I’m not your baby.” I said as I rolled my eyes.
“Come on. I could’ve sang you an Spectrum song. What about ‘How you satisfy me’?” He looked around a little before starting to pretend to have a microphone on his hand. “Honey, your love is what I need…”
“It’s not funny.” I protested in annoyance, Callum looked at the guys paying, he then smirked and looked back at me.
“You know what’s funny? That you didn’t shut me off when I was staring at you, you liked it.” Callum whispered on a teasing manner.
“I’m a married woman, for your information.” I showed my wedding ring.
“That hasn’t stopped me before and it won’t stop me now. Austin doesn’t act like the married man either.”
That was like a stab in my heart, it was humiliating that everyone else knew he was unfaithful, he immediately dropped his smirk.
“I’m sorry— I just like you a lot.” I nodded at Callum, he was beautiful but, he wasn’t what I liked.
Callum just pressed his lips together, he was going to walk off but he stopped to say something.
“If you ever feel, lonely or abandoned. Just call me.” Callum said before he waved at all of us and walked out of the restaurant.
Austin and I went back home, I tried wearing black negligee, hoping he’ll touch me again. It didn’t work, he pushed me off.
“I’m not in the mood, honey. Let’s just sleep.”
Frustrated, I tucked myself under the covers and tried to fall asleep. I knew he was turned on— he was. He just didn’t want to touch me. My days were getting boring, I wished I had something to film, some script sent to me, anything. Everyday I woke up with the hope of getting a text or an email with a new script.
—————————
I thought of Callum’s proposition everyday, I was indeed very lonely. My mind went on and on about his words: ‘If you ever feel, lonely or abandoned. Just call me’
I ended up calling him, just a night out as friends, yeah, friends with capital F. I got ready, I wore a black short skirt and a nice little cardigan. I decided to wear my now light-brown hair on a side ponytail and I styled out my bangs. And surely, Callum and I met at the movies.
We were watching a foolish movie. I was barely even looking at the movie, I was looking at him the whole time and he knew it because I saw that stupid little smirk of his. Swiftly, he placed his hand on my knee, making me smile and look away shyly, like a teenager. After the movie, we got into his car— nervous to do anything wrong, I was very quiet.
“So, you’re lonely all the time?” Callum asked, breaking the silence. I stayed silent, looking out the window. “Tell me, you know it’s just your foolish pride.”
“I stay back home. I’m waiting for a good script to come to me.”
“So what do you even do? You’re lonely and no man is waiting by your side. You seem like the perfect target for a man like me.” Callum joked, I laughed too.
I felt at ease with him, we had a lot of fun even while driving around London. He parked in front of my house, I was in silence. He leaned in and kissed me, not aggressively but romantically, I liked the kiss so I continued it. I never thought I’d make love on the back of a car, afterwards I felt really regretful of it, I was just like Austin now— I had been unfaithful.
“What is it, sweetheart?” He asked after we had gotten dressed again. He caressed my cheek.
“I shouldn’t have done this.” I said in regret, but he just smiled.
“Hell yeah you should have done so. Time for him to get a taste of him own medicine.” Callum said, I had a mental argument with myself.
Should I keep this going or not? I was a woman with needs and wishes of being desired by my husband but he always decided to turn around and go with other women.
“When do we see each other again?” I asked him, if I was going to cheat, might as well enjoy so.
—————————
My relationship with Callum developed into an affair, very passionate affair. While Austin was away having his fun around London and on set hanging out with Callum, we both texted each other behind his back.
Callum reminded me a lot of myself actually, I had told him one time that I liked blonde-haired men and the next day he texted me telling me that he was at a hairdressers appointment, he surprised me with a selfie of him full on blonde, which he already was naturally. He was scolded by producers. I also told him I liked trench coats and men wearing black slacks, next Sunday night, he’s wearing all of that. I was starting to be as demanding as Austin— and I hated it. What if he was feeling pressured or if he started to feel like I felt?
“It’s boring being the same everyday, sweetheart.” Callum chuckled with me, caressing my cheek softly.
“I don’t want you changing yourself.” I said, a bit sternly. “But blonde does bring out your face more, it makes your eyes stand out more.”
I sounded just like Austin. Just like him. Callum and I spent that night together too, but we were surprised when Austin came home earlier. My acting career prepared me all my life for this, Callum was surprisingly smooth, as he pretended to be coming out of the bathroom fixing his shirt while I quickly made the bed and fixed my smeared lipstick.
“What is he doing here?” Austin asked suspiciously.
“He came over, he said he wanted to see Lori and he thought you were here.” I said confidently as Callum nodded from the couch where he was watching Lori play.
“I thought you were here, mate. Sorry bout that.” Callum said, playing innocent for most part. Austin just nodded and took off his coat, placing it on the rack, he bent down to pick up Lori and placed a kiss on her cheek. He walked up to me and he wiped some runny eyeliner. It had smeared on the corner of my eye because of Callum and I having out little get-together in bed.
“Your makeup is all smeared.” He said, his touch being anything but gentle. He then grabbed me by the waist and pulled me closer, he was jealous. Jealous because Callum was there.
“I know— the weather is wet. It makes my eyeliner smear.” I said, I used waterproof eyeliner.
We had dinner together all night, all of us, it was rather uncomfortable. Austin was really jealous.
“You like my wife?” Austin tried to be playful while hiding his jealousy.
“I’d snatch her and Lori at any minute.” Callum answered back jokingly. “I’m kidding but y’all are beautiful family.”
Callum said all while looking at me, I wanted to kill him right there. I just nodded and smiled. And you know what? For the first time in so long— I felt alive.
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mvltisstuff · 1 year ago
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hi hi! i love reading your works, they’re so good and they have definitely inspired me🥹 don’t forget to take breaks and take care of yourself!🥰
the last request with ‘you belong with me’ made me think about ‘happier’ by olivia rodrigo. if you are taking requests, i got an idea😁
buck x reader where they’re both in a “will they, won’t they” relationship, and everyone in the 118 can see that they both like each other and are rooting for them, but buck and reader are kinda oblivious. when things finally start moving between the two, taylor comes back into buck’s life and they start to date. reader gets distant since she really likes buck, and really thought something was going on between them, and she doesn’t want to ruin his relationship.
cue ‘happier’ and it’s basically the reader’s perspective on what happened (even though buck and reader weren’t dating so it wasn’t really a break up). buck wasn’t 100% into the relationship just like taylor. they kind of just use each other to benefit themselves (ex. buck trying to get over reader since he thinks she doesn’t like him back, taylor getting stories to report). buck notices how reader has changed and gotten distant, so he confronts her, and then feelings explode everywhere.
a little angst and hurt-comfort for buck and reader😋
happier - e.b
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summary: request
evan buckley x reader
gif from @livelovecaliforniadreams
a/n: it makes me so happy that you liked and felt inspired by my writing, it’s my fav thing to hear <33 i hope you enjoy this, it’s a lovely idea and i’m so excited to write it!
the entire firehouse saw the way y/n’s face dropped when taylor walked in with buck. her radiant red locks that curled perfectly onto her shoulders, and her strong, confident demeanor being attractive to any man. you can always tell when buck really loves someone. the way his eyes light up and how he could spill his life story within first talking to them. the comfort he finds in people is quick, but there isn’t a connection stronger than y/n. buck pretends, though.
he hates himself for trying to envision y/n in taylor. their relationship was far from ideal, meaningless sex before interchanging stories about their day. stories for taylor to use, and stories for buck to lust over while trying to forget about y/n. maybe with taylor, he just realized that y/n was only a faint memory in his mind.
she became smaller and smaller in his life, and it silently pained him. she barely said a word to him, not wanting to ruin anything he had going on. between drunken conversations and relentless flirting, it didn’t seem like he wanted her the way she did. he missed their late night texts and pairing up on shifts. he longed for her shoulder to lean on and her guidance to listen to. he wished for her to be his, but she couldn’t be. so, he lay in bed next to the other woman in his life.
it became like a chemical reaction, suddenly exploding all over the place and the mess being near impossible to clean.
y/n had washed all the ash and cleared her body of the dusty uniform. she shoved it all back into her locker, hoping not to see buck and taylor before leaving. just her luck, she was confronted with his arm around her shoulder.
“hey y/n!” he says, excitedly like there’s nothing that could be wrong. it almost makes her smile, seeing how gleeful he is. “leaving already?”
“yeah, i’m just gonna head home instead,” she tells him, his nose scrunching up in confusion.
“you don’t want to get any drinks with us?” taylor asks, tilting her head to show off her blaring stare that drills into y/n. “you guys can give me some inside info on the report i’m running.”
“not tonight, i’m not really feeling up to it.” the longer she stares at the couple, the more she wants to slam her head into her locker. it’s agonizing to watch him slowly fall for another woman and it’s out of her control. it’s even worse for buck to know y/n is slipping away and he can only watch.
she begins to walk past, bucks arm lightly brushing her own and the hand that used to bring comfort only leaves chills down his spine. it may have been safe to say that he officially lost his y/n.
it felt like with losing buck to another woman, everything piled down on top of it. more people were lost on jobs, her family became more distant, and absolutely nothing was the same. usually, she’d have buck to confide in, but he was off being with someone else. y/n missed the way he would look at her, but now his eyes only belong to the glow of taylor. his silly stories and blurbs of thoughts aren’t things that make y/n’s day anymore. instead, taylor receives the words that y/n once claimed as her own.
it didn’t matter if there was a sunny day because somehow, a thick cloud formed over y/n’s head. the things she used to do with ease at work drained her, just wanting to be out of bucks sight and not have to be drowning in her own thoughts.
she doesn’t back down, though. she still shows up to work every single day with the fear of disappointing everyone. so, she gathered around the table with the rest of her team, getting ready to dive into one of bobby’s meals. her friends noticed her silence, not looking at buck or even conversing with him. it was rare to see her in such a state of upset, especially one where she wasn’t leaning on buck for help. they could all see clearly where her mind was.
“i was thinking of taking maddie out somewhere nice this week, any ideas?” chim asks the group, the ones of experienced daters including the infamous buck.
“oh! there’s a lot downtown that women love. i took taylor down there the other day…” the whole sentence drifted off into y/n’s head, pushing the small crumbs around her empty plate. she’d rather watch paint dry than listen to bucks stories about his girlfriend, who should be y/n.
no one really engages in bucks story, besides the new transfers and the probies trying to find out how to make their own lover happy. however, the ones closest to y/n and buck saw right through the little act she had on. leaning back in her chair with a blank expression gave it all away. every word that left bucks mouth, they knew, only left another stab into y/n’s heart.
“i mean, y/n,” buck acknowledges. “you’ve met taylor and maddie, do you know what they’d like?”
y/n glances up at him, just wanting to scream into his ears that taylor’s not the one for him. if she has to shout it to herself in her own head, maybe he deserves to hear it. “maddie would love anything,” she smiles softly, making buck grin at the thought of his loving sister. “i’m sure taylor would too, as long as she can get a good news headline from you.”
heads turn, hens eyes widen a bit as she looks up from her plate. chim stops with a bite in his mouth, his gaze shifting from y/n to buck. buck was just completely lost, thinking y/n thought better of taylor. buck never thought of her using him, but y/n was always the most observant person he knew.
“cap, you all done? i’m gonna start the dishes early tonight.” y/n stands up, smiling brightly at bobby who awkwardly hands his plate over to her. she gathers a few other empty dishes, dropping them into the sink as she desperately creates as much distance from buck as she can.
the rest of the 118 clears out of the kitchen, staying out of y/n’s way knowing that she needs a moment. they can see the tension written all over her face, but they can’t stop buck from waltzing over to her.
“you know you can talk to me right?”
“what do you mean?” she asks.
“c’mon, y/n. i just don’t know why you’d say that in front of everyone. i’m just worried about you.”
“you don’t have to be worried about me.”
“you haven’t talked to me in weeks. or, even since taylor came back.”
she whips her head over to him, beating her eyes into his. “i don’t know if that’s a me-problem.”
“i think it might be,” he squints, watching her turn her head back to the knife she was cleaning the hardened food off. “i’ve tried to connect with you these past few weeks and you aren’t even trying at all.”
“buck, all you talk about is her and how amazing she is. it’s like you completely forgot i existed, or that i even have a life. just think about when she left you in the dust last time and who was there to pick up the pieces. or who was there whenever you got hurt, or needed someone to call. i have never seen her bending herself over backwards to make sure that you’re happy. i’ve never seen her drive herself crazy because of how much she needs you.”
buck can only notice the reflecting light in her eyes only getting stronger by the second. y/n could feel her neck getting hot and her nose start stinging alongside the shakiness in her chin. her vision was continuously blurred as she scrubbed at the serrated blade in her hand, letting it be covered with the soap she could barely see before it just slipped like a feather. despite the long gash on her hand, it still wasn’t worse than the humiliation she felt in front of her favorite person.
she just leaned into the glass wall while sitting on the bench, wrapping her hand out of the gauze to examine the cut she had gotten. the slice to her palm had almost become a faint memory compared to the engraving thoughts in her head.
“it doesn’t look too deep,” she hears the low voice come from the door of the room. “but i can’t see too well from her.”
her head only lifts, but doesn’t turn to look at him. “can i come in, please?” she doesn’t say no, so he takes that as a sign that she won’t attack him if he does. he sits beside her on the bench, closely looking at the cut before covering it again with the bandage and gauze. “we should talk.”
“i don’t know what there is to say.”
“maybe i do, y/n,” he says. “i’m sorry. i never wanted to leave you in the dark but that’s exactly what i did. i just never knew that you really thought that about her.”
“i don’t think it, i see it. i’m not trying to be a bitch, i just want you to be happy.” with me, she thinks. “i didn’t want to flip out or anything. you mean a lot to me and i won’t watch you get hurt again.”
“i know, and i don’t ever want to see you hurt yourself or have someone else hurt you. it doesn’t matter who i’m dating, i’ll never care for you any less.”
she only turns the corner of her lips up; she was wanting a better answer but that’s all she had. all she expected, that it. “i’m probably gonna head home soon. i’m exhausted.”
“i’m gonna get going too, i have to shower and visit maddie,” he stands, brushing his hands on his thighs as he sighs. “love you, i’ll see you tomorrow.” he grins but it almost looks agonizing as he steps out of the door, grabbing his bag and wandering out to the car.
the ride home for both of them was painful silence. buck never thought he’d be in a position where two girls wanted him, or at least loved him. the more he thought about it, did two really love him?
taylor loved the idea of buck. the sexy firefighter with badass stories for the cutthroat journalist. she only understood the outside of buck, the exterior and maybe some of the wounds he had. she would never want to understand his mind.
y/n understood all of it. his beauty, internal and external. she understood his love for the world around him and his nurturing energy. she understood his trauma in the past and put it to ease. she made it feel like more of a past rather than something that still haunts him. she understood his desire to love someone and his craving to be loved. she understood that he was more than just a story to be told, but that he was a man to be cherished and held onto. not one that taylor could easily let go. he feels insane for not seeing the radiant bursts of love that come from y/n, and he feels ridiculous to the fact that he hasn’t given it back. he wants her to be right next to him through everything and he only wants to fight battles with her. she would give up the world for him, so the least he could do is try to give it to her.
a sharp u-turn was what landed him at y/n’s apartment, his hands fluttering together. his heart pounded through his body and into his ears and his spine held a column of anxiety. she could fall into his arms and agree to live long with him, or she could push him further away and he would be too late. there was only one way to find out. y/n was the one waiting at home for him, not taylor.
he cruised up the stairs, easily skipping over each one praying that he didn’t miss his chance to love on her. his feet heavily thumped on the carpeted stairs of the apartment building. it felt like a movie scene, a sickening lead up to a moment that could make or break the story. one to leave the viewers enamored or one that leaves everyone in tears.
he saw the beloved number engraved on her door, knocked in harshly but then slowing down. he came her to confess, not scare her out of her mind.
he taps his feet against the floor, not caring about the other people who might see him pacing around in the inch of space. his heart starts to feel like it’s going to light up into flames when he hears the soft footsteps of y/n come to the door. she swings it open, looking casual but disappointed as ever.
he doesn’t think, he can only move. he’s always been notorious for that, but he knows it’s not a mistake now. it’s what he wants, and what he needs.
“buck?” she questions, only to be instantly cut off by his tall frame walking into her. his hands connect with the sides of her face, cupping her jaw as his soft, pink lips fall into place on hers. she stumbles back at the sudden force of him on her. there’s no time to think, no time for anything but to take the moment for what it is. his lips move smoothly against hers like they were made to kiss from the moment they met. his kiss was like a secret that y/n was dying to keep and she wanted to protect for the rest of her life. it was steamy and hot, but it was equally passionate and warm-hearted.
the seconds that followed were the thing buck feared most. she could freak out at him, or she could accept him and his insurmountable love. he didn’t know what to think when her jaw fell open and she just gandered at him. “what- why? i though-“
“i’m done hiding from who i really want. i’m done being stupid and oblivious to the truth. i’m done keeping you away from me. you’re all i’ve wanted, and i’ve just been so scared to let it happen. i’ve been so scared to love you, but i can’t hold it in anymore.”
y/n runs her hands through her hair, her eyes becoming glossy as she looks up at him. “why are you just saying this now?” she sighs, her exhales coming out strong through her mouth. “i’ve been ruining myself over you!”
“i know, y/n,” he says. “and it was the worst mistake of my life to let you fall behind. and i’ll be damned if i let it happen again. i love you.”
suddenly, the world stopped spinning along with the dread inside of y/n. the weight was lifted off bucks shoulders and he didn’t have to carry it anymore. he didn’t have to take his mask everywhere to pretend he was happy with his situation. he doesn’t have to pretend not to love her anymore. her name sounds better next to his.
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bymaemeadows · 1 year ago
Text
bad idea
Pairing: miguel o'hara x f!reader
Word Count: 3.5k
Summary: Miguel and you have been seeing each other on and off. You both have had a bad day and found your way to each other. It’s a mistake but your body calls to his. He is addicted to you but refuses to admit that he wants you back. I have been listening to GUTS by Olivia Rodrigo on repeat so I took some inspo from that.
Warnings: language, smut, biting and blood (bc vampire), choking, he’s kinda mean but it’s kinda hot
A/N: This is my first time posting fanfic in a really long time and my first time posting here so sorry if anything is off. I wrote is all in one sitting so sorry about any errors. Kind Feedback is welcome.
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Walking up to Miguel’s door feels bittersweet. You’ve been here countless times. Sometimes, with his arm around you after a romantic evening and other times running away after a disastrous fight with tears falling on the very steps you climb now.
Still, you can’t stay away. You had the whole trip over here to reconsider but through the hurt you've caused each other, the pain you’re in now calls to his pain. You don’t give yourself a chance to slip into shame or feel foolish about reaching out to him because there’s already enough shit going on in your life. You knock on the door because ringing the bell would be so loud and the cheery sound doesn’t match the moment.
A few moments and he’s there. He’s in dark blue sweatpants and a fitted white shirt. Your eyes linger on his muscled chest before scanning the harsh lines of his face and the unreadable look in his eyes. Without a word, he steps aside to let you into his home, eyes on you the whole time. The transaction already feels familiar because this isn’t the first time they’ve collided like this after swearing it would never happen again. Well, you promised yourself. He’s never pushed you away with his words but in the way he lets his anger tarnish anything good between you two.
But you’re not here to get him back. You both know this meeting is supposed to be purely physical – the biggest lie. You still love him.
He follows you like a shadow. He’s close enough to touch you but heads to the bar against the wall to get you both drinks. You’re too antsy to sit so you make your way to the large windows that overlook the city. You feel his approach and he reaches around your body with a wine glass but instead of handing it to you, he reaches up to brush a finger down your face and neck. You melt at the affectionate touch, starved since the last time you saw him. You turn your face towards him and he looks you up and down appreciatively, taking a sip from his glass tumbler of his favorite whisky. You know that as soon as your lips meet, you’ll taste the drink on his tongue.
“Here,” Miguel says. Placing the wine glass in your hands but his eyes are locked on yours and stays there as you take a sip. It’s your favorite too. The one you would always stock his stash with.
“Thank you,” you say but it comes out quieter than you intended. Like a whisper. He’s so close but tears his eyes away to look over your head and out the window and take another gulp of his drink, slipping his other hand into his pocket. His stature is so at ease while you’re sure you’re trembling. You take another sip of your wine and turn back to the view. 
“You know, you’re always welcome here” Miguel says but his tone is cold and at odds with his words. “You don’t have to knock.”
Your face starts to heat because it sounds like a reprimand. But you feel the press of his body at your back and he’s moving your hair from your neck. His breath fans across your ear and now your skin is on fire.
“You’re the only woman that can have me anytime. I crave you always. You know that, right?” his lips brush over your heated neck as he speaks and you lean into his hard body, eyes fluttering closed and hands clutching your drink.
His hand trails down your arm and rests on your hip, holding you to him as he kisses your neck in the way he knows makes your toes curl. You can feel his hard cock against the softness of your ass. You turn your head to capture his lips but he pulls away, leaving fizzling electricity where his warmth was. Whirling to face him he brings his drink to his lips, eyes on you. You arch a brow and bring your glass to your mouth too. Eyes on each other you both drain your drinks. Your tongue slips out to lick your lips and he tracks the movement.
He leans in to capture your mouth and you back up until you’re pressed against the cold window. His mouth is demanding and you open to him, his tongue tasting exactly like you knew it would. Before you can deepen the kiss and get your hands on him, suddenly, he grabs the glass from your hand pulling away to take both glasses back to the bar. Leaving you frustrated and breathing heavily against the glass. 
Teasingly, he turns and stalks towards you slowly. Miguel’s eyes are fire and ice at the same time. Before he reaches you, he’s pulling off his shirt. Your eyes dance over his skin, the dip of his sweats, to his length straining against the fabric. You press yourself against the glass as he invades your space and cups your face with both hands, slamming his lips against yours. You part for him so he can dominate your mouth. Your hands scramble to grab the top of his sweats and pull him against you. His hands leave your face to brace his palms on either side of your head. You tip your face up to receive the full force of his kiss and reach to hold his ass in your hands, pushing his hardness between your legs. 
You break away from his lips to trail kisses across his chest as you reach into his pants and wrap your fingers around him. You feel his hot breaths against the top of your head as he towers over you, letting you stroke him. You reach lower to gently tease his balls then back up to find a bead of cum leaking from the tip. Pulling your hands out of his pants, bringing it to your lips. He pushes away from you to watch you suck it into your mouth. His breaths are ragged and his dark hair is hanging in his eyes. 
With a smirk on his lips and a slight shake of his head you’re in his arms again. Your ass is in his massive hands as he carries you to the bedroom. His mouth is all over you, your lips, your neck, the tops of your breasts. Instead of dropping you on the bed, he sets you down on your feet to slip the straps of your dress off your shoulders, taking your bra straps with it. As soon as your breasts are free, he’s lifted you into his arms again to suck on your skin and nipples. You press him closer with your hands in his soft waves. 
“Please, Miguel,” you beg. “Bite me, please.”
You feel his chuckle even with his nipple between his teeth – the dull ones, not the sharp ones you crave. You still don't feel the pierce of his fangs. Frustrated and needy, you start to grind yourself against him. 
“Oh I am going to taste you. Don’t worry about that,” he says as he trails kisses back up to your neck where you suck in a breath in anticipation of his bite.
Instead, you’re falling. He’s laid back on his huge bed with you now straddling him. 
“Want me to earn it?” you tease and rotate your hips over his cock, still restrained in his pants and boxers. His groan fuels you but his hands grip your hips, stilling you. Your eyes cut to his but he’s got a playful grin on. 
“Yes, earn it.” He says coolly. “Come here. Sit.”
Eyes widening, your spine stiffens but you steel yourself. Peeling yourself off him and the bed, you walk around, slipping off your dress but when you reach for your panties, his voice stops you.
“Not yet. You wore that for me, didn’t you?” He teases putting his hands behind his head. You blush because of course you picked a matching set of underwear for this self-inflicted booty call. Your bra is still hanging on for dear life so you leave it and the panties on as you climb back on the bed, this time to straddle his face. His arms come up to grip your thighs and pull you closer. You gasp and tilt forward, catching yourself with arms on either side of his hips. He’s kissing the insides of your thighs and around your center. ‘Earn it’ he had said so you pull down the waistbands of his pants and boxers to pull his cock free. He bends his legs, feet flat on the mattress, hips lifting to bring his length closer to you. 
Using one hand to stroke him, you also push back to press yourself to his mouth. He’s now sucking and nibbling through the fabric and you can feel how soaked you are. He grips you tighter but you lean forward to take him in your mouth. Teasing his tip with your tongue and then licking him, dragging your tongue flat up his considerable length. His groans of pleasure feel like they’re vibrating the air in the room as you chase his pleasure. The muscles in his legs are taunt and his grip on your legs tighten but he starts to pull you back to his face.
“Damn it. I told you to sit,” he grumbles. He could easily overpower you and pull you to him but you know he’s really enjoying exactly what you’re doing as you suck him while your hand grips him at the base and stroke him nice and slow. 
“Fuck,” he breathes and starts pulling your soaked panties to the side before slowly pushing a finger into you. You gasp with your mouth still around him and he takes that as an invitation to start finger fucking you hard. The force of his work means your mouth is now bobbing up and down on his tip and your moans vibrate through both of you. He adds another finger, racing after your climax. His cock is still in your mouth but you’re truly at the mercy of his fingers. You feel your release rising and rising so you remove your grip from his base and start to reach for your clit to push you over the edge.
“I got you, baby,” he says before pulling you completely on top of his face. His cock popped out of your mouth and your body slid against his until his mouth was fully devouring you. Without his cock in your mouth, your whimpers and moans come out loud. 
“Oh my god,” you groan and his hands anchoring your legs to keep you still tighten at your encouragement. You free your hand from between you and reach forward to grip his dick so you can stroke him for every stroke of his tongue on your clit. 
His diligent tongue pulls you closer and closer to coming. When he starts sucking you, it’s all over. You gasp and moan through your orgasm and your body jolts from the intensity but he holds you still, not easing up to draw out every pulse of your pussy. When the last wave of ecstasy fizzles out, he loosens his grip. You start to rise, lifting yourself off his face but he stills you just a few inches away to pepper kisses to your inner thigh.
“Oh, baby, you’re not going anywhere yet.” he tells you between kisses.
“I need you inside me, Miguel,” you whine and he responds with a chuckle but then you feel the scrape of his fangs and you stiffen, suddenly alert.
“I thought you wanted something else…” he teases, accentuating his meaning with another scrape of his fangs on your thigh. 
“Yes, please. Please, Miguel,” you beg, reaching again for his cock again to grip and stroke him. 
He buries his face into your skin and groans. You feel it all over your body and stroke him faster to elicit the wonderful sound again and again. His cock starts to twitch against your grip as his pleasure builds.
With a growl, he tosses you off him. You bounce on the mattress, a bit stunned by the loss of him but you feel his hands on your ankles and he’s dragging you towards him and the edge of the bed. He bends his huge body over yours, his cock just at your entrance. He captures your mouth in a punishing kiss, hands digging under you to unclasp your bra and tossing it. With full access now, he's kneading your breasts before sliding to hold your waist. You’re able to gasp for breath as his mouth travels down your body. His mouth is hovering over your breast when his eyes flick to yours. You nod, knowing his question. A sly grin pulls at the corners of that devilish mouth before they part to show his fangs. A growl tears from his throat before he clamps down on your soft skin. 
You cry out in pleasure laced with pain and jerk in his hold. You feel the pull of his mouth as he drinks deep from you. The mouth that just gave you an earth-shattering orgasm is barreling you headfirst into another with the way he’s drinking you.
He releases your breast with a sign, his mouth now red from your blood. His eyes pop open and lock on you. You watch his Adam's apple bob as he swallows. He leans down to lick where his fangs punctured and you whimper and arch off the bed. When you open your eyes again, you see he’s standing straight, holding his cock in his hand, stroking himself while he licks your blood off his lips. He’s so beautiful. His sweats are still slung low on his hips but he looks perfectly disheveled.
You wiggle your body to bring yourself right to the edge of the bed. Opening your legs, inviting him to finally enter you. He continues to stroke himself, eyes roaming over you approvingly. You know there must be little trails of blood leaking from his bite because as he steps closer to notch himself at your entrance, he leans over to lick the blood. 
You grab his face to bring it to yours but you feel him hesitate in your hold. You meet his unsure eyes and give him a reassuring smile before he succumbs and crashes his mouth to yours. You open for him and his tongue slowly enters and with it the metallic taste of your own blood. You hum at the taste which spurs him on because his kiss deepens as he starts pushing the tip of his cock into your wet and waiting core. 
The kiss breaks and your head digs into the bed as he pushes into you. His groan sounds so tortured and you realize it’s because his control is slipping. You turn to look at his hands that are bracing on either side of your head to see his claws piercing the bed. You try to find his eyes but his dark hair is hanging in his face, his body locked up as he pushes in another inch.
“Miguel,” you whisper and reach up to run your hands down his chest. The veins under his skin, now pumping with your blood too, strain under your fingers. Another inch and you’re writhing under him. Desperate, you hook your legs around him to pull him closer. His body is so still he’s not moving an inch. You call to him again and he lifts his head enough to peer at you though his waves, his brows low over his eyes. His jaw is locked but his eyes are bright as he searches your eyes. 
“Miguel,” you whimper as your heart beats wildly at the vulnerability he’s allowing you to see. “Fuck me, please.”
His brows soften and he releases a ragged breath and pushes fully into you. He straightens pushing his hair out of his face while looking down at where you’re now connected. But he’s not moving. You need him to move. You use your legs around him to start grinding against him. He allows you to lead and draw your own pleasure for only a moment before his hands with his talons now gone grip you under your thighs and push them towards your head. He leans over you and starts thrusting at a slow but delicious pace. His eyes watch your face as his cock moves in and out. You try to keep his eye contact, but when he picks up the pace your eyes slam shut but your mouth opens to beg and cry and moan at his punishing movements. Your fingers dig for an anchor in the sheets and your hand finds one of the holes he ripped earlier. A satisfied smile spreads across your face and you open your eyes to see a similar grin on his mouth. 
“You like what you do to me,” he states. “You drive me insane,” he admits with a dark chuckle and your heart tightens at the tenderness in his eyes. Your hands move into his hair and gently scrape your nails along his scalp. His answering groan has him slowing his movements to grind against you. 
You watch his face as he responds to your touch. Like a tragic god. His beautiful body and immense strength both focused on you, chasing both of your pleasure. His eyes peel open to lock on to yours and then something flashes in his gaze and his hands and body are moving to flip you on to your stomach. He roughly pulls your panties down your legs and then slaps your ass.
“Crawl,” he commands and you glance back at him, he's stepping out of his pants and boxers while taking ragged breaths. You crawl up the bed on hands and knees, anticipation curling low in your stomach. You feel the bed dip behind you before you feel his hand on the back of your neck gently guiding you so your ass is up in the air. The soft sheets tickle the Miguel’s bite mark as your breasts press into the bed. 
When you feel him rubbing his hardness up and down your folds you bury your face and moans in the sheets. Then he’s pressing into you at the most delicious angle that has you whimpering unintelligibly. He pumps into you once and then twice, low groans coming from clenched teeth, before unleashing himself on you. His hips slamming against your ass and skin slapping skin as he finds the rhythm that just might kill you.
“That’s it baby. You take me so damn good.”
His balls slap against your clit and you jolt at the contact. Breathe. You turn your face, your cheek digging into the mattress to gulp down air.
“Miguel! Fuck!” you cry amongst other sounds that you probably haven’t made since your last trist with him. The only man you’ve been with since you met and you know deep down you don’t want anyone else. Just him, forever.
You feel yourself fluttering around his cock as another orgasm threatens to sweep you away. 
“Ugh fuck, baby!” he groans grabbing your ass cheek in his large hand as he pounds into you over and over. 
You’re so close and you can feel his thrusts get more desperate as he gets close to his own release. You release your grip from the sheets to slip your hand under yourself and to your clit. 
“Fuck! Damn!” he chants over and over when he sees you pleasuring yourself. “You’re so sexy, baby, so beautiful.”
As your orgasm builds you feel your pussy tighten around him and he grips you harder adding the delicious bite of pain to your sweet pleasure. Your releases crashes into you and your shaking and moaning and crying out as your pussy milks Miguel’s cock as he continues to fuck you, wringing wave after wave out of you. 
“That’s right. So good. You’re fucking amazing,” he praises but it comes out strangled sounding. Then he’s pushing your hips into the bed so you’re now flat and he takes on a new but equally punishing pace as he fucks your hips into the mattress. 
Still sensitive from coming, this angle makes you delirious. You just dig your face and hands into the mattress and hold on as he chases his own orgasm. 
“You want me to come in your sweet pussy, baby?” he asks.
You mumble in agreement against the bed but then his hand comes around to grip your throat lightly and lifts your face off the bed. You hold yourself up and he moves the hair from your face.
“I’m gonna fill you up with my cum,” he says, leaning over you to speak in your ear. “Beg me, baby.”
“Yes please -” you say on a shaky breath. His hand comes up to grip your throat again. “Please fill me.”
With your permission now secured, he slams into you roughly. His groans and moans unabashedly loud he chants your name and praises right before his orgasm rips away his words and he growls as he spills inside you. His twitching cock and grip on your throat steals another release from deep in your stomach. Your soundless cries die on your lips when his hand falls from your throat to grip the breast with his bite mark, thumb smearing the blood.
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jelestes · 2 months ago
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MY BENOVAK HCS
• Liv still knows Casey’s coffee order
• The first and — unfortunately — only time they had sex was the night Casey left New York for good and that’s why Liv never responded to the “have you ever made love to a woman?” question.
• Part of Casey will always be in love with Olivia even if she isn’t ’pinning for her anymore and that fills her with anger.
• Due to her severe comphet issues Olivia denies — and suppress — both the night they shared and her long term feelings for Casey but even the thought of the former ADA makes her knees go weak, she freezes every time she hears Casey’s name.
• Casey still hopes that one day Olivia realizes she loves women in a romantic way, not even for the sake of their situationship but because she cares about Olivia and wants her to find love and happiness.
• When Olivia is having a particular hard day she types Casey number but never makes the call, she’s not even sure Casey still has the same phone number (she does) but she loves to type the numbers out just to see her name pop up on her screen.
• Olivia used to hang out at Casey’s office when she had enough of the precinct, they’d work silently side by side just enjoying each others presence.
• Huang would listen to Casey’s hours rant about her feelings for Olivia.
• Olivia still looks for Casey in every person she gets involved with and is frustrated when none of them make her feel the way Casey did, deep down she knows that’s the reason she’s never satisfied in any relationship she has but she’ll never admit that to herself.
• They check each other socials every now and then.
• Both have moved on but at the same time they didn’t and at some capacity they never will.
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hotdaemondtargaryen · 4 months ago
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OLIVIA COOKE INTERVIEWED FOR FLAUNT MAGAZINE.
Waiting just beyond reality’s gauzy guardians, the other world lies just under the duvet in the throes of school night darkness: a library book stuffed under a pillow, a cave of blankets, thrilling stalactites of story to be illuminated by a covert flashlight.
That’s how Olivia Cooke remembers her induction into the fantastical, anyway.
“Reading all night, and then sobbing into my pillow at 4am—audibly—with my mum shouting at me to go to sleep.”
Cooke isn’t taking any breaks—she’s already working on a new project with Robin Wright, psychological thriller The Girlfriend, set to be released through Amazon Prime Video.
The actor has a propensity for vivifying characters to the fullest extent regardless of medium or genre:
“I am picky,” she tells me about the breadth of her work,
“But I’m just not exclusive.”
WHAT IS IT THAT AUDIENCES LOVE SO MUCH ABOUT MUTILATION AND POWER, ABOUT CREATUREHOOD AND POLITICS IN WESTEROS, THE LAND UPON WHICH GAME OF THRONES AND HOUSE OF THE DRAGON IS SET?
Cooke muses, people are fascinated with the idea of escape—an out that the Game of Thrones franchise has certainly provided to an anxious, overworked public.
She ponders further, positing:
“We as humans want to feel like we’re giants and godlike creatures who can tame a beast like a dragon. Maybe it’s this innate feeling in us of the need to conquer."
“God, especially the fucking Brits.” [She laughs]
“What does that say about us?”
I ASK COOKE IF THE EXCITEMENT SURROUNDING THE SERIES—PARTICULARLY THE QUESTIONS SHE (GLADLY) FIELDS ABOUT THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP—HAD MADE ANY IMPACT ON THE WAY SHE FRAMES HER OWN RELATIONSHIPS?
“I don’t think that the show has necessarily made me reevaluate friendship.”
“I just think that with the age that I am at now, getting into a new decade, I’ve prioritized my friendships in a different way.”
“I think that, especially in culture, [friendship] sort of takes the backseat.”
“You’re meant to prioritize romantic relationships and familial relationships in your life, but friendships feel deeper and everlasting in a sense.”
WE APPROACH THE SUBJECT OF POWER—THE TIMES WHERE IT'S APPROPRIATE TO KEEP IT, THE TIMES WHERE IT'S APPROPRIATE TO DELEGATE:
“I think it’s always better to relinquish power when you recognize wisdom.”
“Relinquish unhelpful power, whether that be insecurity or ego, when you are confronted with someone who has more lived experience or is just more knowledgeable in said field.” Duly noted.
Cooke feels the most powerful, though, when she’s surrounded by friends, going on walks listening to a well-curated playlist, or when she really finds the music in a particular scene.
Though she doesn’t make music herself, there is a symphonic quality to her acting—it’s the same sort of kinetic energy governed by a discernible rhythm that makes any sort of artistic output worthwhile.
“It’s all sort of coming from the vulnerable prism of you, isn’t it? Any sort of creative endeavor.”
OLIVIA COOKE MAKES A PLAYLIST FOR EVERY CHARACTER SHE'S EVER PLAYED—SAVE FOR ALICENT.
She claims she “doesn’t know why,” but one might suspect tracks for the Alicent playlist wouldn’t be readily accessible on any sort of streaming platform...
Perhaps a Gregorian chant or a live recording of a knife being sharpened on a hot stone would be more appropriate.
ACROSS ALL CREATIVE MEDIUMS, ACTING OR OTHERWISE.
Cooke adds that she’s “trying to nurture that spark of vulnerability and not shy away from it is quite important.”
“We’re so mannered now— especially the English—so repressed in that sense. We still have this culture of having a very stiff upper lip in the face of adversity and real emotion and grief.”
“To be able to play those emotions in a really intense way—but in a very safe environment—feels very cathartic, and it’s an opportunity to push yourself to those limits and see, as an experiment, what your body does and how you would react in those moments.”
“You’re always trying to find the truth in it.”
Cooke likes to dive into characters (the tender, damaged Lou, the cystic fibrosis patient Emma Decody, the terror-stricken Laine Morris, the ever-vengeful Alicent)
“Because of this exploration of truth, but also because she’s really nosy and curious.”
“I want to dive deep into who [these characters] are... I think that is the most wonderful part of [the] job, that we get to live all these lives in one life if we’re lucky.”
Olivia Cooke speaks with a diction nearly impossible to not listen to. Her outwardly energetic parlance and melodic speak might be the recipe for a certain viral video involving a beverage choice.
SHE COMES FROM A THEATER BACKGROUND, AND WHEN ASKED ABOUT A CLAIM SHE MADE A COUPLE OF YEARS BACK IN WHICH SHE POSITED SHE MIGHT BE MORE CUT OUT FOR TV THAN THEATER BECAUSE OF THE REQUISITE “BIG FACIAL MOVEMENTS OR BIG ARM GESTURES.”
“It’s so awful, isn’t it? Just like...What a cocky little twat! No, I’d love to do theater [again].”
“That girl does not know what she’s talking about. Bless her,” she says, still giggling.
“Sometimes the things I’ve said get repeated back to me and I’m like, ‘God knows...’ because usually I am just making stuff up in the moment.”
IS THERE ANYTHING MORE TO LIFE, THOUGH, THAN THE MOMENT?
She finds herself hoping that, in her golden years (if she’s not senile), she reflects on this present moment aglow with new work and long friendships and internet memeage—with fondness.
“I would like to remember, despite all the constant worrying, that I had a lot of fun.”
“I allowed myself to have a lot of fun. You can indulge, you’re not going to be smited. You can enjoy this time. It’s not going to go away just because you had a nice time.”
Though being smote is perhaps the most terrifying thing any actor or civilian might experience by most standards.
There are other, more tangible things that scare Cooke: Laziness. Inactivity. The vast blankness of dormancy.
“When there’s a bit of a fallow period, that’s when I scare myself with my own thoughts.”
“My mum always says: An idle mind is a devil’s playground. I completely relate to that.”
“When I’m not generating, when I don’t feel like I’m working towards something, that can be quite a scary place for me.”
ABOUT HORROR FILMS AND SOME FILMS FROM HER LETTERBOXD.
The horror is not in the hiding, but in the not knowing.
It shows in her work. It shows in her Letterboxd.
“My Letterboxd does veer on the side of the MORE INTENSE.”
“BORDER by Ali Abbasi is one of my favorite films.”
“I love ROSE GLASS.”
“I think SAINT MAUD was incredible.”
“These are really uncomfortable films to watch but incredibly artful ones.”
“The Luca Guadagnino SUSPIRIA as well...”
“[I like] the ones that leave you with such a distinct off kilter feeling after you’ve left the cinema.”
We’re talking, again, about traversing that seam between the worlds of fantasy and reality—that ever-opaque, grotesque sublime that was so easily accessible so many years ago, that ever-thickening border between adulthood and the imagination.
“It’s a bit of a thrill, isn’t it? It’s like being on a roller coaster. That’s the anticipation. That’s the unique selling point. You want that ride.”
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